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I am a tap dance student, and last night was our yearly recital. As I stood in the wings, literally, reading a review copy for an upcoming book about anorexia, I was surrounded by dancers of all ages and shapes. As a job hazard, I watch the kids for signs of eating disorders. Since no one is eating on the stage - or face the wrath of Miss Linda - you may wonder what I'm looking for.
This was one of the first books that I read shortly after being diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. I wanted to be sure that I was diagnosed correctly. Coincidentally enough, I have not been correctly diagnosed by my current psychiatric nurse. She says that I'm a Bipolar II and I think I'm Bipolar I, according to the DSM-IV-TR. She told me once that it didn't matter as long as the treatment took care of my episodes. But it's the new edition, the DSM-V, that has really grabbed my attention.
I saw an article on CNN today about how Walmart's sales at U.S. stores fell 1.4% from the same period last year. When customers are living paycheck to paycheck more than ever before, the sales aren't there because "customers can't afford the gas to get to the stores and that they're increasingly using food stamps when they get there." It's no secret we are living in difficult times. It's a no brainer that anxiety levels in the country must be rising. It made me wonder how much.
Sometimes the ADHD mind strikes when you least expect it leaving you holding a big bag of embarrassment. Do you have good friends to not hold it against you?
The anniversary of my father’s passing is nearly here. It’s given me pause to reflect on what my life’s been like this last year. I went into a deep depression that lasted from September to February. I had a short lived hypomanic episode, too. I would say that I wish my year had been better, but it could’ve been worse.
We've all heard of patients and parents of patients "Googling" an illness or treatment and arriving to appointments with print-outs and pointed questions. The problem is new, but not unexpected. New technologies and access often make people nervous. There was a time when women weren't allowed to read novels and locomotive trains were believed to cause internal damage because they traveled so fast. To be fair, the public is known to over-reach on new ideas as well: the Atkins Diet and pet rocks come to mind.
I have a cat. Got her as a cute kitten but now she is a cat. This is the first one that I have ever owned. I am a big animal lover, but this cat has been testing my patience. She has issues with a quiet house. Anytime someone is sleeping, she can't stand it and starts meowing. She meows right outside my daughter's door when she is napping. The worse thing is she meows every night, when the family tries to sleep and again, in the wee hours of the morning. Constantly meowing. Loudly! She has food and water, access to the outside, access to any room she wants, lots of cat toys, two dogs to play with, but nothing keeps her quiet. On top of all that, she's mean and bites or scratches you if you try to touch her. I am at my wits end, willing to try anything so I don't have to give her away.
Many of us lose colossal amounts of time while trolling the net for new information. Do we have to unplug the internet and go back to reading by candlelight, or can we have our digital cake and eat it too?
My faith has waned. I don’t have faith that I’ll be able to complete a successful school semester due to my recent bipolar episode. If it happens again, I need to be prepared and I just don’t know how to do that. I’m worried that I won’t be able to do the work that I need to do. In my head I hear myself scream, “Failure!”
Have you noticed that it is just assumed in our society that everyone wants to be thin? Thin is never defined, and seems to mean "smaller than anyone else in the room." Everyone seems to agree that being thinner is a constant quest, and that the only difference between people with an eating disorder and everyone else is how strong that "drive for thinness" is. I don't buy it, and I'll tell you why.
Where do we go from here? Most of the family thinks just to let her hit bottom and then if she reaches out to help any we can. Some want to just keep paying her bills and just let her sit in the house with no responsibilities. Never been on medication and impossible to get to her when she refuses to talk to ANYONE.
Help.
On the day we agreed to videochat to make things less awkward IRL she woke up with a migraine so we rescheduled to the day after, I made sure to assure her that it was okay and to take her time. Later that day, in the late evening we had a nice chat but suddenly she stopped replying, even though nothing had happened. The day after I texted her good morning and said I hope she was feeling a little better. she wouldn't open my texts.
A couple days after I sent her a longer text saying that even though I had only known her for a short time I care a lot for her and would like to know how she are doing, telling her I'm there for her, assuring her I'm not going anywhere even though things might not be very easy. She wouldn't open it.
A week later I sent a text saying not to feel bad about not answering and that I will be there when she is able to answer again. It's been two weeks since this and she still hasn't opened my texts. She hasn't been active at all.
I don't know what else I can do. I assumed she might have fallen into a depression. I have tried to just not think about it anymore, and I haven't that much but when I do it sort of kills me inside...