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I'm an optimistic person and an activist by nature. I'd rather talk about what we, as parents, CAN do than what NOT to do. But sometimes doing less is not only best, it is lifesaving.
This past weekend, I attended a 2 day photography workshop. I picked this particular workshop because it wasn't too far away from where I lived. I paid for it over a month in advance and I was really looking forward to it. I knew when I paid, I would cross my fingers that my hubby would be in town to watch the little one, but that he could possibly be gone as well. Sure enough, the day before the workshop, he had to fly out of town at the last minute for the entire weekend. It made things complicated; which was what I wanted to avoid.
What happens when a clinician tells our child to do something we don't agree with? This is confusing for children, at times, and for us! The reality is that when we take our child to consult with a professional, we are engaging in co-parenting at some level. Another adult is telling our child what to do. But, at times, these instructions are in opposition to our guidance, and that great friend of eating disorders -- triangulation -- gets a boost.
In late 1998, I knew that something was wrong with me. My life was going well; I was in university, on my way to a computer science degree, in the co-op program and had completed an eight-month job in Calgary. I had been contented and grateful since leaving my mother’s house and moving to a new town. I was more happy than I had been in years. But little by little, I found myself increasingly sad and life became peppered with bouts of meaningless, spontaneously crying. I was unreasonably moved by the foretold unfolding of TV plots and commercials.
In November 1998, I found myself in a pitch-black room, unable to get out of bed for an entire day. I was in the south of Spain, a ten minute walk from white sandy beaches and half-naked women. That was the moment I truly realized I was broken: I was in heaven and yet crushed with sadness.
We all know that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. It should never be skipped, even if you are feeling nauseous from morning anxiety (Morning Anxiety 101: 5 Useful Tips). Eating right away when you wake up gets your metabolism going which will help you lose weight, and can regulate blood sugar levels which can relieve morning anxiety.
Email can become confusing and overwhelming for the adult with ADHD. So many distractions and noise—a veritable Pandora's Box. Today I discuss my system to get on top of the inbox.
I just came back from the Academy of Eating Disorders international conference in Salzburg. To my chagrin, one thing I discovered is that eating disorder treatment professionals around the world can't agree on eating disorder terminology. They still use different terms to describe the same thing, and it makes discussing eating disorders very confusing.
I have had this exchange a thousand times,
“I’m really depressed.”
“Why, what happened?”
Have you been missing the plot?
Back in 2002, when I first started learning about eating disorders, it was rare for the media to mention genetics. Now it is rare for it not to be mentioned. But how much further are we on this? The idea of a genetic predisposition to eating disorders still causes a range of reactions: from relief to ridicule.
Have you ever been in a stressful situation and made it out alright, but then had a panic attack afterward when everything calmed down? I had a family vacation I was stressing about once. I was worried before we left, but I didn't have any anxiety on the trip itself, until the drive home when the worst was over. I suddenly and unexpectedly got hit with a panic attack I couldn't manage. What's up with that?
Where do we go from here? Most of the family thinks just to let her hit bottom and then if she reaches out to help any we can. Some want to just keep paying her bills and just let her sit in the house with no responsibilities. Never been on medication and impossible to get to her when she refuses to talk to ANYONE.
Help.
On the day we agreed to videochat to make things less awkward IRL she woke up with a migraine so we rescheduled to the day after, I made sure to assure her that it was okay and to take her time. Later that day, in the late evening we had a nice chat but suddenly she stopped replying, even though nothing had happened. The day after I texted her good morning and said I hope she was feeling a little better. she wouldn't open my texts.
A couple days after I sent her a longer text saying that even though I had only known her for a short time I care a lot for her and would like to know how she are doing, telling her I'm there for her, assuring her I'm not going anywhere even though things might not be very easy. She wouldn't open it.
A week later I sent a text saying not to feel bad about not answering and that I will be there when she is able to answer again. It's been two weeks since this and she still hasn't opened my texts. She hasn't been active at all.
I don't know what else I can do. I assumed she might have fallen into a depression. I have tried to just not think about it anymore, and I haven't that much but when I do it sort of kills me inside...