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Anxiety is stupid. That’s how a high school student once described it to me. In that moment, nothing more needed to be said. Anxiety is stupid; it’s a plain and simple truth. In the next moment, though, something did need to be said. The truth about anxiety was incomplete. Anxiety is stupid, I agreed, and you are smart. Adding that second part, the bit about you—everyone—being smart shifts our attention ever so slightly away from anxiety and onto ourselves as people who are smart, strong, and capable of beating anxiety (it is, after all, stupid). Anxiety is stupid because it says you can’t do things. You’re smart because, despite anxiety’s lies, you can do things. Here’s why you’re smart and capable.
Those of us with depression will often experience situations that can trigger depressive episodes. Since we can expect these events to occur, we need to have some effective coping strategies in place. What effective strategies can we use to cope with these triggers?
There are several milestones leading up to the early stages of self-injury recovery. First, is the recognition of the problem. Second, is the recognition of wanting to do something about the problem. Third, is actually taking action to address the problem. Fourth, is arriving, finally, to a point at which what you have gained from your efforts to recover from self-injury outweigh the problem of self-harm itself.
Explaining anxiety isn't an easy feat. As someone who studied English literature in school, I often turn to poetry to help me gain perspective. The great poets have been through the same struggles we have, and their work is an invaluable testimony of those struggles.
I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder in my early 20s, and since then I’ve received many different reactions when disclosing my mental illness. Many people are supportive. Others are curious. Sometimes I face mental health stigma. Writing for HealthyPlace means my diagnosis is out there for anyone to see. I’m fine with that because I want to help and I want to fight stigma. However, in my day-to-day life, I choose whom I want to tell and when I want to tell them. Here are a few of the good, the bad, and the ugly experiences with disclosing my mental illness diagnosis, not necessarily in that order.
Self-love and depression don't naturally go together because when you have depression, it’s hard to love yourself. Being constantly bombarded with negative thoughts about how you’re not good enough or how you’ll never amount to anything doesn’t exactly help your self-esteem. You get inside your own head and tell yourself that you are not worthy of love.
I think it was Jessica McCabe of "How to ADHD" who referred to herself, someone with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), as an ADHD late bloomer. I have found numerous forums where ADHDers wonder whether (or assert that) they are late bloomers. There are several reasons why people with ADHD might be considered late bloomers and there are reasons why being an ADHD late bloomer is not such a terrible thing.
Knowing what to say to an emotional abuse survivor is tough – I get it. Having been on the receiving end of a lot of unsolicited advice both in and out of an abusive relationship, I know that people tend to say the wrong thing more often than not, and that's generally okay. Most of the time, our loved ones mean well; they just don't know what to say. It's not their fault, either. Topics like emotional abuse and coercive control are seldom discussed, and when they are discussed it's usually in the media, where victim blaming is very much alive and well. However, what you say to a friend or loved one in recovery from verbal abuse counts for a lot, so here's what not to say to verbal and emotional abuse survivors.
How should you respond when a friend talks to you about his mental health support needs? Those who receive this invitation may feel some mixed emotions, so I'd like to address those feelings. You can handle requests for the mental health support needs of your friends in different ways.
It has been my privilege to write for “Life with Bob” on the HealthyPlace.com blog for this past year. HealthyPlace provides such a valuable resource to the community of people living with mental illness, offering insights, information, and open communication on the wide variety of issues that affect our community. Therefore, it is with some sadness that I say “goodbye” to my role in this fine organization.
Where do we go from here? Most of the family thinks just to let her hit bottom and then if she reaches out to help any we can. Some want to just keep paying her bills and just let her sit in the house with no responsibilities. Never been on medication and impossible to get to her when she refuses to talk to ANYONE.
Help.
On the day we agreed to videochat to make things less awkward IRL she woke up with a migraine so we rescheduled to the day after, I made sure to assure her that it was okay and to take her time. Later that day, in the late evening we had a nice chat but suddenly she stopped replying, even though nothing had happened. The day after I texted her good morning and said I hope she was feeling a little better. she wouldn't open my texts.
A couple days after I sent her a longer text saying that even though I had only known her for a short time I care a lot for her and would like to know how she are doing, telling her I'm there for her, assuring her I'm not going anywhere even though things might not be very easy. She wouldn't open it.
A week later I sent a text saying not to feel bad about not answering and that I will be there when she is able to answer again. It's been two weeks since this and she still hasn't opened my texts. She hasn't been active at all.
I don't know what else I can do. I assumed she might have fallen into a depression. I have tried to just not think about it anymore, and I haven't that much but when I do it sort of kills me inside...