Blogs
Losing a friend or loved one to suicide can be devastating and cause a storm of roiling emotions that threaten to overpower you. Among the many strong emotions you may be feeling are anxiety and guilt. These emotions are complex and multifaceted, making them hard to deal with. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
Recognizing suicidal thoughts in yourself or others isn't always easy. The problem is, suicidal thoughts don't always look like you think they should. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
Did you know that workplace suicide is on the rise? According to a 2018 Bureau of Labor Statistics report, there has been "an 11 percent increase in work-related suicides." Today, owing to the pandemic, mental health issues have taken a turn for the worse. In fact, the World Health Organization recently announced that "mental health, suicide prevention needs greater attention during pandemic." (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
When self-esteem is poor, the risk of suicide is higher, and as a senior citizen living alone, I recognize that I am particularly at risk right now. The COVID-19 pandemic is causing older people and those with health issues to isolate, including me. Isolation can increase depression, which when untreated, can lead to thoughts of suicide. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
Mistakes can make a person suicidal. I know this because, in the past, that person was me. Making mistakes has made me feel suicidal. Is this an overreaction? Yes, of course it is, but that doesn't mean it isn't a real reaction. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
Teenage suicide was an issue before the COVID-19 pandemic started. Due to the drastic effects of the pandemic on mental health, suicide is an even bigger concern for teenagers now. By knowing the exact reasons and signs of teenage suicide cases, you can save lives. Continue reading to learn about how to prevent teenage suicide during the COVID-19 pandemic. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
A critical aspect of dissociative identity disorder (DID) is the parts, or personalities (including young personalities), that are within the headspace of the individual with the condition. It took me years before I was finally able to identify my own parts, converse with them, and create a healthier place in my mind for them to exist, especially when I have been experiencing suicidal ideation. That being said, it isn’t impossible, even when it may feel like it while dealing with younger parts. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
The suicidal thoughts that plagued my mind in the throes of my eating disorder recovery were expected. I hated my body. I hated myself. I hated my life and the society in which I lived that kept telling me I was not enough. One thing I did not expect was to still feel suicidal thoughts during my eating disorder recovery. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
In general, suicidal thoughts are not normal, but they have been for me lately. I have been actively working toward my recovery for over six years now, and yet for the last two months, I've experienced some kind of suicidal thought nearly every day. I don't want to die, I just want to hit "rock bottom" so I can finally actually get better. (Note: This post contains a trigger warning.)
Lately, I have been thinking about what it looks like when someone experiences mostly invisible illnesses, like anxiety and depression, and feels suicidal. Depression and anxiety are not always visible. People have expressed to me their surprise that I have dealt with chronic anxiety for a long time. But it's true, and I guess at some point I became really good at always acting like everything was fine. (Note: this post contains a trigger warning.)
Where do we go from here? Most of the family thinks just to let her hit bottom and then if she reaches out to help any we can. Some want to just keep paying her bills and just let her sit in the house with no responsibilities. Never been on medication and impossible to get to her when she refuses to talk to ANYONE.
Help.
On the day we agreed to videochat to make things less awkward IRL she woke up with a migraine so we rescheduled to the day after, I made sure to assure her that it was okay and to take her time. Later that day, in the late evening we had a nice chat but suddenly she stopped replying, even though nothing had happened. The day after I texted her good morning and said I hope she was feeling a little better. she wouldn't open my texts.
A couple days after I sent her a longer text saying that even though I had only known her for a short time I care a lot for her and would like to know how she are doing, telling her I'm there for her, assuring her I'm not going anywhere even though things might not be very easy. She wouldn't open it.
A week later I sent a text saying not to feel bad about not answering and that I will be there when she is able to answer again. It's been two weeks since this and she still hasn't opened my texts. She hasn't been active at all.
I don't know what else I can do. I assumed she might have fallen into a depression. I have tried to just not think about it anymore, and I haven't that much but when I do it sort of kills me inside...