Blogs
Yesterday, I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Armand DiMele, for his radio show on WBAI in NYC, which airs Tuesdays and Wednesdays at 1 PM.
We talked about many things, using my book Ben Behind His Voices: One Family's Journey from the Chaos of Schizophrenia to Hope as a launching pad for advice for families.
What Armand most wanted to cover was the need for early detection (when does "my child is a little bit off" become "this is a possible mental illness"?), the experience of other family members (siblings, spouses, children as well as parents of those with a mental illness), and the need for communication skills and self-care in dealing with our loved ones. He rightly saw our family story as a platform for introducing others in similar situations to the need for things like education (such as NAMI, and of course HealthyPlace.com), support, advocacy, respect and self-care.
I took off a week off blogging, and after a mini breakdown of anxiety and panic attacks, I wanted to discuss in detail the importance of self care, and healthy coping skills not only in early sobriety, but in life as well. I will be on vacation next week and feel really passionate about this topic so I did two vlogs to talk about struggles, healthy coping skills, self care, and how it is important to take care of ourselves before we can help anyone else. I hope you enjoy and look forward to coming back in two weeks refreshed from my vacation off all media, internet and lounging by the pool in palm springs! If you want a funny puppy story definitely watch the second video :)
My coworker Ricky is a photographer, and I asked him to take some pictures for my personal blog. Upon hearing its name he said, “You’re bipolar? Cool." Ricky is the kind of person who appreciates perceived shortcomings as character building. And he likes people with a lot of character.
If you are a verbal abuse sufferer, your abuser tells you how selfish you are on a regular basis. You listen to your abuser's opinion on this matter with bated breath, waiting to hear how you are acting selfishly so you can stop doing it...right now! The backwards thing about it is that you martyred yourself for the relationship by sacrificing so many of your own "selfish" desires that you are now creating a confined, tiny life full of limitless impossibilities.
When I picked up Bob from a week-long visit with his father last weekend, I knew it was going to be a tough day. It always is when he comes back from these visits. I never know what exactly to expect, just that conflict will arise.
This time, the conflict was within me.
My name is Natalie Jeanne Champagne and welcome to my blog, Recovering from Mental Illness. I am twenty-six years old and am a freelance writer among other things. (People are, of course, much more than their chosen profession!) I have spent the last couple of years working to lessen the stereotype of mental health issues and this blog will reflect that.
I have published a book, "The Third Sunrise: A Memoir of Madness" on my experience with bipolar disorder and addiction. You can learn more about it on my website @ www.thethirdsunrise.com
I have already laid out some ideas on procrastination. This time, I want to speak about delaying paperwork, especially invoicing for the self-employed and expense reports for those employed.
Recently I spent the night in the psychiatric emergency room. While I was there, the police brought a suicidal drunk woman in. Short version: she created a huge disruption, refused treatment, tried to leave and was eventually arrested for public intoxication.
Mental illness, especially when combined with a substance abuse disorder, is an easy way to wind up in jail.
During my abusive marriage, I learned a disordered and negative coping mechanism. The coping mechanism made me behave manipulatively. It sometimes made me wonder if I was the abuser. This coping mechanism kept me blind to the real danger I lived in but very aware of how much I blamed only myself for causing so much pain. Some call this particular disordered coping mechanism codependency.
I talk about bi-polar disorder. As in, two poles - mania/hypomania and depression. The name is extremely descriptive.
But as it turns out, there is something in the middle (besides normalcy, whatever that is); it's called a mixed mood episode. Mixed moods possess distinct characteristics of both depression and mania. Mixed moods severely impair judgement and carry a significant risk of suicide.
Where do we go from here? Most of the family thinks just to let her hit bottom and then if she reaches out to help any we can. Some want to just keep paying her bills and just let her sit in the house with no responsibilities. Never been on medication and impossible to get to her when she refuses to talk to ANYONE.
Help.
On the day we agreed to videochat to make things less awkward IRL she woke up with a migraine so we rescheduled to the day after, I made sure to assure her that it was okay and to take her time. Later that day, in the late evening we had a nice chat but suddenly she stopped replying, even though nothing had happened. The day after I texted her good morning and said I hope she was feeling a little better. she wouldn't open my texts.
A couple days after I sent her a longer text saying that even though I had only known her for a short time I care a lot for her and would like to know how she are doing, telling her I'm there for her, assuring her I'm not going anywhere even though things might not be very easy. She wouldn't open it.
A week later I sent a text saying not to feel bad about not answering and that I will be there when she is able to answer again. It's been two weeks since this and she still hasn't opened my texts. She hasn't been active at all.
I don't know what else I can do. I assumed she might have fallen into a depression. I have tried to just not think about it anymore, and I haven't that much but when I do it sort of kills me inside...