Blogs
The holidays are no longer around the corner; the holidays are now here - on top of us. The holidays have overtaken us. They have lay siege to our everyday lives and they have won. The holidays! Ack!
And while this sieging of lives has its plusses (like prezzies) it also has its downsides - like instability.
So now that you're staring the fat man in the eye, here's what you need to know to have a safe holiday and an unhospitalized new year.
We get lots of Top 10 lists this time of year. So I’ve made up a list of my own. It’s the Top 10 Things I Know I Should Do to Battle Depression.
Even a bad decision has its usefulness! More Than Borderline's Becky Oberg talks about how bad decisions give us the experience to make good decisions.
This topic is close to my heart...or, rather, high on my level of irritation. Diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of twelve, I have seen my share of psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers---I am missing a few people, er, professionals. The list is extensive. Some of us are blessed to be working with a wonderful mental health team right of the bat.
Diagnosed with a mental illness? This is your new psychiatrist, he or she will make you well, provided you put the work in! My experience has been quite the opposite--a bit more complicated.
Contradictions in Diagnosis
The holidays can bring a lot of stress to people, and there may be an increase in triggers for those in recovery. There are a lot of articles and stories about how to stay present, and mindful of recovery throughout the season. I think it is important to continue to remind people to embrace a perspective of gratitude for all the joys we have in our lives. It isn't only a necessary recovery tool, but important for all areas of our life when we feel overwhelmed or stressed.
Let’s admit it: family dynamics can be huge triggers for those of us with mental illness. Social support can be great, and we all need to know that we have people in our corner when things get bad. However, families are often the breeding ground for the very emotions that make our illnesses harder to manage. So, how do you prevent Aunt Margaret and Uncle Joe from sending you from the living room couch to the therapists’ couch?
It has been said that - an expectation is a preplanned resentment – and since the holiday season is built upon wave after wave of rosy, grandiose expectations it is reasonable to imagine that an avalanche of resentments ready to sleigh you cannot be far behind. This is particularly true for those of us who every day unwrap that most bizarre of all gifts, commonly referred to as mental illness.
As ever, your friends at Funny In The Head are here to help.
Yesterday, I met with the "team" to discuss an IEP for Bob (my 4th-grade son, diagnosed with bipolar disorder and ADHD).
Apparently, the team has met before--without yours, truly--as I discovered a couple of weeks ago when I emailed the principal asking whether we were going to meet before or after Bob's teacher returns from maternity leave. The return email I received from the school psychologist indicated no meeting had ever been held, but Bob's ineligibility for services via IEP had already been determined and we could meet to discuss a 504 plan.
All too often women are presented with the black/white thought that they can be either 'good', or get what they want. Not true!
First, what do we mean by 'good'? Every girl grows up learning what this means in her family, school, and eventually professional life. Whatever your definition, whatever 'the rules' are for you, they're probably more flexible than you imagine. Even if you experience anxiety (really).
Second, strength isn't being tough on yourself
How she got a job on our unit, I'll never know.
When I was a patient on the borderline personality disorder (BPD) unit at Larue D. Carter Memorial Hospital in Indianapolis, we had a patient-led group. Staff stayed out of this group; it was strictly for us.
L (name withheld) didn't care. She came into the group, and when we protested, accused us of "plotting against staff" and said we needed to "respect my authority."
This was not going to end happily.
Where do we go from here? Most of the family thinks just to let her hit bottom and then if she reaches out to help any we can. Some want to just keep paying her bills and just let her sit in the house with no responsibilities. Never been on medication and impossible to get to her when she refuses to talk to ANYONE.
Help.
On the day we agreed to videochat to make things less awkward IRL she woke up with a migraine so we rescheduled to the day after, I made sure to assure her that it was okay and to take her time. Later that day, in the late evening we had a nice chat but suddenly she stopped replying, even though nothing had happened. The day after I texted her good morning and said I hope she was feeling a little better. she wouldn't open my texts.
A couple days after I sent her a longer text saying that even though I had only known her for a short time I care a lot for her and would like to know how she are doing, telling her I'm there for her, assuring her I'm not going anywhere even though things might not be very easy. She wouldn't open it.
A week later I sent a text saying not to feel bad about not answering and that I will be there when she is able to answer again. It's been two weeks since this and she still hasn't opened my texts. She hasn't been active at all.
I don't know what else I can do. I assumed she might have fallen into a depression. I have tried to just not think about it anymore, and I haven't that much but when I do it sort of kills me inside...