Depression is a family disease. Not just because it runs in families—but because it can ruin families. Yet it doesn’t have to be that way. I am a happily married man with three wonderful children, and yet I suffer from depression. And my depression affects the whole family. Children are incredibly perceptive. My 8-year-old picks up on it even when my bouts with depression aren’t so severe. My 10-year-old keeps things inside, so he rarely comments about it, but he notices.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. So what does one do for depression? I’m not really sure, but there seems to be ample evidence of the importance of good nutrition in battling depression. That’s not such good news for me, and I imagine others who suffer from depression feel the same way. It’s hard enough to make sure I take my various medications at the right time every day. Add the stress of balancing work and family—including three active kids who play sports year-round—and eating well ranks pretty low on the list.

My wife recently left a note by the bed that hit me right between the eyes. And it hurt. “I’m not sure what is going to make you better, maybe nothing,” she wrote. “I’m not sure what else there is out there to try. Right now, I feel like we are back in a bad place, and I am finding myself exhausted and apathetic.” It got worse.

It’s cocktail season. And that means millions will drink too much, including people who suffer from depression. While having a drink can relieve anxiety—at least temporarily—abuse of alcohol can make us even more depressed. And though pop culture paints a decidedly different picture, alcohol is actually a depressant. It’s not a stimulant.

We get lots of Top 10 lists this time of year. So I’ve made up a list of my own. It’s the Top 10 Things I Know I Should Do to Battle Depression.

Depression caregivers need our support, too.