The Twelve Steps of Co-Dependents Anonymous: Step Ten

Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

For me, Step Ten is about accountability.

I am an accountable and a responsible adult. With God's help, I am striving to make healthy choices I am also learning to take responsibility for my choices.

As I continue living the program, I am daily monitoring my attitudes and actions. I am daily learning more about God and God's will for my life. Hence, I am daily learning more about myself.

As I grow and develop, I uncover new facets of myself, my personality, and my attitudes that need to be addressed. Sometimes I find qualities that need to be strengthened; sometimes I discover additional character flaws that need to be eliminated.

Some days, new situations shed light on areas that were previously dark to me. Some times I realize God has waited until this certain moment to reveal some aspect of myself that I was, until that moment, unready or unwilling to examine.

Daily, I take an inventory of myself. I am accountable to God, to myself, and to my fellow human beings. When I am wrong, I admit it. I don't make excuses. I don't try to cover up. I don't try to minimize. I don't try to rationalize. I simply admit that my words or my actions were wrong. I make amends quickly, and determine not to repeat the same mistake.

At the same time, I don't shame myself. I don't beat myself up and tell myself I'm a terrible person. Just the opposite, I tell myself I'm human. I tell myself it's OK to be less than perfect. I give myself permission to feel my feelings, to start over and try again. I affirm that God still loves me. I affirm that I still love myself. I affirm that making mistakes is part of being human. But I work to make sure I don't repeat the same mistake.

Step Ten is about learning today's lesson and making the necessary adjustments in my actions and attitudes. Step Ten is about being honest with myself and with God and with others.

Step Ten is also about maintaining a humble attitude. Yes, I'll stumble and fall sometimes, but that is part of life. Failure is part of success. I only fail completely if I fail to learn today's lesson and repeat it again tomorrow.

I am a child of God, and by God's grace, I will continue to grow and develop. I will continue to learn more about God's will for my life. I will continue to remain accountable for my words and actions. I will continue living my amends and working my program of recovery.

Step Ten is God's grace—God directing and creating my life—continuing the process by which I become all I am capable of becoming.

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next: The Twelve Steps of Co-Dependents Anonymous Step Eleven

APA Reference
Staff, H. (2008, November 22). The Twelve Steps of Co-Dependents Anonymous: Step Ten, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, July 15 from

Last Updated: August 7, 2014

Medically reviewed by Harry Croft, MD

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