Here's what's happening on the HealthyPlace site this week:

• Sexual Addiction
• "Being a Sex Addict: What Does That Really Mean?" On HealthyPlace TV
• Coming in May on HealthyPlace TV
• Followup on the What Is It Like Living with Major Depression? TV Show
• Mental Health Clinical Trials
• The Irrational and Holistically Meaningful Nature of Triggers
• Controlling Your Anxiety Symptoms and Treatment of Anxiety

Sexual Addiction

Many smirk or outright laugh at the words "sexual addiction." Sex addicts lead secret, troubling lives and for those suffering with sexual addiction, it's not a joke.

"Being a Sex Addict: What Does That Really Mean?" On HealthyPlace TV

Our guest has been struggling with sexual addiction for over 20 years. Brittany will share her story of trying to obtain sexual sobriety.

This Tuesday night, April 28. The show starts at 5:30p PT, 7:30 CT, 8:30 ET and airs live on our website.

• TV Show Blog with this week's show info
• Dr. Croft's blog post on "Treating Sexual Addiction"

In the second half of the show, you get to ask Dr. Harry Croft, your personal mental health questions. Watch the show on-demand.

Coming in May on HealthyPlace TV

• Eating Disorders Treatment: Recovery from Eating Disorders and Why It's So Darn Difficult
• Treating Borderline Personality Disorder: Is It Possible?
• Child Abuse and Its Impact Later in Life
• Your Child's Mental Health: What Every Parent Should Know

If you would like to be a guest on the show or share you personal story in writing or via video, please write us at: producer AT healthyplace.com or info AT healthyplace.com

Click here for a list of previous HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Shows.

More Information on Sexual Addiction

• Using Sex Addictively
• Symptoms of Sexual Addiction
• Online Sexual Addiction Screening Test
• Causes of Sexual Addiction
• Treatment of Sexual Addiction
• The Partner's Role in Sexual Addiction and Getting Help for the Partner
• 12-Step Programs for Sex Addicts and Partners

Followup: What Is It Like Living with Major Depression?

"It's pretty crummy; that's for sure!," writes Rubina. Michael put it very simply: "It's depressing."

Last week's feature on major depression drew a huge response from our readers. Nearly 100 people wrote in to comment and share their experiences. We've added several more personal stories of living and coping with major depression

Mental Health Clinical Trials

There's a news story out that more and more people with mental health concerns are turning to clinical trials as a way to get diagnosed and treated. If you are considering joining a clinical trial for a psychiatric condition, we have some important information you need to read. In addition, you can search for mental health clinical trials directly from the HealthyPlace.com website.

The Irrational and Holistically Meaningful Nature of Triggers

In the mental health field, the word "trigger" is usually something that acts like a mechanical trigger in initiating a process or reaction.  For instance, if you suffer from PTSD due to a car accident, maybe the sound of squealing tires triggers severe anxiety symptoms and flashbacks of your own accident.  But our guest writer asks: Do all triggers need to have a specific cause?

More on Controlling Your Anxiety Symptoms and Treatment of Anxiety:

• An Inside Look At Anxiety
• Managing Your Anxiety
• Conquering Your Panic, Anxiety, and Phobias
• Anxiety Disorder Relapses
• OCD: Getting Control of Your Obsessions and Compulsions
• Anxiety Videos

back to: HealthyPlace.com Mental-Health Newsletter Index

I recently spoke to a friend on the phone who says he can't see me lately because of his mental health problem. Earlier, he told me that he is avoiding hot drinks and hot food because he believes that the heat from them is affecting and damaging his brain. When he avoids hot drink and foods he feels fine and so I told him to do what works for him.

I asked this friend what symptoms he gets when he is drinking hot drinks and eats hot food and he said that he felt less alive and, basically, that he felt more empty. I asked him if he felt empty of emotion or energy. He responded that he felt empty of memory and confirmed to me that his memory was going away. I suggested to him that he may be repressing painful or complex memories, which some people do in order to stay sane. Some exploration and catharsis of bad memories is good, but self-repression isn't all bad and can also be very useful; and helpful.

I also mentioned that he might have a form of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), in terms of the avoidance behavior (people with OCD repeat or avoid harmless things, or they fear bad things will happen to themselves or their loved ones if they don't avoid the triggers), but he said it wasn't a compulsion, as he has stopped drinking hot tea and hot food altogether.

Psychological Triggers Aren't All Bad

I explained to my friend that there are such things as triggers - experiences or events - which can bring back bad, painful, or traumatic memories. In his case though, the trigger of hot drinks and food repressed his memory, and therefore doesn't flood or cathartically release it.

However, I felt it was necessary to point out to him, that contrary to the psychotherapeutic view that triggers are linked to bad, painful, or traumatic memories - triggers can be completely irrational and have no causal meaning to them.

When I was very mentally unwell in 2000, before I stayed in a psychiatric hospital for three weeks, I thought that there was something implanted in my computer and television which was firing radiation at me and destroying my brain. There is no psychotherapeutic link to this trigger for me because I only have happy memories of watching TV and using my computer, although it could be argued that those things had stopped me from socializing face-to-face with other people.

The other key thing about triggers is that although they can be irrational and not linked to past or recent bad, painful, or traumatic events, the triggers all make sense and have meaning and explanation when they are all linked up and understood holistically together. This is the approach which is needed in psychotherapy, against the old simplistic, dogmatic, and sometimes inaccurate model.

About the author: Peter Donnelly is an anti-psychiatric campaigner in the UK who advocates a more humanistic approach when it comes to mental health treatment.

next: How to Manage Your Stress in a Bad Economy
~ anxiety-panic library articles
~ all anxiety disorders articles

With major depression, it was like being in another world. I would see others around me smiling, and enjoying things that they were doing, but I couldn't be the same way. There was always a part of me that was missing. Here's my personal story of living with major depression.

I am Berniece. I am 33, and have been dealing with major (clinical) depression since 1990.

Major depression is not a fun disease to have, but it is manageable. Before being diagnosed with depression, I lost relationships that I had, not only with my significant others, but with family members also. No one knew what was going on, and before I received a correct diagnosis for depression, I couldn't explain my behavior to anyone as I couldn't account for what was happening.

I lost interest - not only with my friends, family, but also with my husband and children. Different things would make it worse at times, like being under a lot of stress. I became suicidal and had feelings of being a burden to everyone who cared about me; and this is the part that would over take my world the most.

A Suicide Attempt: The Trigger for Getting Depression Treatment

I sought treatment for depression when I realized that my daily obligations were suffering and not getting done in the proper way that they should have. Not only did I quit taking care of things for myself, but also for others who depended on me. My family also suffered from how I was behaving. It seemed to, in a way, make them depressed and worry about me more then normal.

While I was working with everyone, I had a depression relapse. I overdosed on medications and tried killing myself. Thank goodness I didn't, but I saw something that night, that I had never seen before. I realized how worried and hurt my sister and nephew were, but it did not stop there. I also saw the disappointment on my doctor's face. Not a "you stupid" or scolding face, but the face of a genuine caring person. This is something that I never want to see again, and just that thought when depression kicks in, all I have to do is think of that, and it reminds me that I am very much cared about and not a burden to anyone.

Depression Relief from Antidepressant Medication and Therapy

At this time, I am on antidepressants. When I started taking depression medication it worked for a couple of years, but I became immune and the antidepressant was ineffective. My doctor started me on another antidepressant, but I needed an extremely high dose of the antidepressant for it to be effective and that caused horrible side-effects. So for awhile, I was put on a low dose because of being a high-risk person for dying by suicide.

As I searched the Internet for depression information, I realized an overnight quick fix is not possible with depression. I then sought another doctor's help. We tried several medications for depression until he found an antidepressant medication that I could handle. It worked wonders for me. As with before, the antidepressant did lose some of it's effectiveness over time, but the doctor added other medications to it (antidepressant augmentation) and life became much more enjoyable. Medication for depression is not all I am doing at this time to make life more tolerable and enjoyable. I am doing a group therapy for depression, and seeing a private therapist.

Sticking with Depression Treatment Makes A World of Difference

I have been in my programs, along with my antidepressant medications for four years now and everything is so much different. My family is more understanding. I can deal with situations better than before. I am working on getting a higher education again. I am in a more steady relationship, where the one that I am with understands that I can't handle everything all the time. Before, I wouldn't tell any of my significant others what was going on with me. Now I have found someone I can share my thoughts and feelings with.

It may have taken 15 years of living with major depressive disorder to finally become more satisfied with myself, and my life, but it is well worth the effort that I put into it as it is a great feeling to know that I have survived. My depression will never go away, but it is manageable with the right antidepressant medications, team members (people who work through it with you), and a good support group. By support group, I mean family, friends, and or a group of people that gets together to help each other out, and let them know they are not alone.

Have A RAINBOW of a DAY

next: What's Life Like with Severe Major Depression
~ depression library articles
~ all articles on depression

Many smirk or outright laugh at the words "sexual addiction." For those suffering with sexual addiction, it's not a joke.

We all know about repetitive, destructive, compulsive behaviors—things we know as "addictions" like drinking too much alcohol, using drugs, compulsive overeating, compulsive undereating (anorexia)—and yet not nearly as many are aware of compulsive sexual activity.

There is a controversy amongst experts about whether this represents a "true addiction" or not, or whether it is just repetitive, compulsive, destructive behavior. When most of us think about having sex, we imagine having non-forced sex, envisioning pleasurable activities, and it is difficult for some to imagine that non-forced sex can actually compulsive sexual behavior. The people with the behavior tell us that they feel "driven," compelled to engage in sexual behaviors, which they know are at best inappropriate, and at worst are potentially destructive.

Whether it is compulsory masturbation or risky sex or compulsive viewing of internet pornography or other impulsively driven sexual activity, the end result is generally:

• negative feelings of guilt
• embarrassment
• shame
• self-anger or loathing
• impairment in productive day-to-day activity

The Outcomes of Sexual Addiction

Compulsive sexual activity can result in the acquisition of sexually transmitted diseases, legal or social entanglements, or destruction of otherwise appropriate relationships. I have known of patients with the disorder to be respected individuals involved in productive work, and have had what appears on the outside to be "perfect relationships with their spouse."

Generally the behaviors are driven only partly by sexual pleasure, but mostly by feelings of anxiety, anger, depression, or stress. The end result of the disorder is generally negative outcomes for the person involved, and when discovered can cause problems not only for the individual but for all those involved with the sufferer.

Treating Sexual Addiction

The good news is that if identified for what it is, a disorder, there is help available for those who suffer from "sexual addiction." Treatment for sexual addiction generally involves individual psychotherapy, group therapy, and if possible a 12-step support network of those suffering from a similar disorder (such as sex addicts anonymous).

More information about the treatment of sexual addiction is available elsewhere on the HeathyPlace.com website.

On the HealthyPlace TV Show on sexual addiction, Tuesday April 28, (7:30p CT, 8:30 ET live and on-demand on our website), we will discuss sexual addiction and its treatment in more depth.

Dr. Harry Croft is a Board-Certified Psychiatrist and Medical Director of HealthyPlace.com. Dr. Croft is also the co-host of the HealthyPlace TV Show.

next: What Is Treatment-Resistant Depression?
~ other mental health articles by Dr. Croft

I've recently been selected to sit on a youth reference group with the Mental Health Commission of Canada. I am so honoured to be selected to this committee because it gives me an opportunity to share my knowledge and experience with mental illness on a national level.

The main goal of this youth reference group is to come up with a national strategy to break the stigma attached to mental illness. Youth have an extraordinary amount of strength and resiliency, but they also have the highest rate of suicide (especially among Aboriginal youth) and there is an unprecedented amount of stigma attached to mental illness. Needless to say, this Commission is well over-due. Embarrassingly enough, Canada was one of the last G8 countries to develop a national strategy that addressed mental illness, even though we experience one of the highest rates of suicide in the world.

So why was I selected to sit on this youth reference group?

Aside from my personal and professional dedication to giving Aboriginal youth a voice in regard to suicide awareness and prevention, I lived with depression for most of my teenage years and began to self-mutilate when I was 14. The self-mutilation started when I realized how much ‘relief' I felt from scratching my arms until they bled. It progressively got worse, and I was soon using knives, razor blades and scissors to achieve the same euphoria that I felt that first time. From what I've read about alcoholism and drug-addiction, I look at cutting in the same light-it is much like an addiction. It is never too far from your thoughts, and the healing process is long and trying.  

At the peak of my depression, I was probably cutting myself once a day. I tried to hide it as best as I could and for the most part, people ignored the marks on my arms even if they did notice. I would hear my peers comment on it from time to time, but very few ever asked me if I needed help. I suppose I was too proud to admit what I was doing, and in retrospect I probably wouldn't have accepted their help anyway. But for me, it wasn't meant to attract attention-it was truly my way of dealing with the emptiness that I felt at the time.

Compounded with my shame attached to self-mutilation, I was also extremely self-conscience. I felt like people were always judging me. But yet I still participated on sports teams, I was on students' council, I worked a lot, I went to parties, I volunteered . . . I was determined to impress everyone. But I also felt like I was always letting people down. So I began lying and manipulating people into believing what I felt to be the truth. I alienated myself from the few friends I had going into high school, I would lie to my parents, I would even lie to my psychologist at the time (" ... everything is great Doctor!").  

But why did I do this? My family was supportive, I did have friends who were willing to help me, and of course my psychologist was trying to help me. But all of that didn't matter at the time. When I was in that place, it didn't matter who was willing to help me because I only saw one solution-cutting.

The shame, the embarrassment, the STIGMA . . . I didn't want people to think that I was a ‘freak' or looking for more (negative) attention than I was already receiving. God (and everyone else around me) knew how self-destructive I was-even if they didn't know that I was cutting myself.

But now, at the rip old . . . err young . . . age of 23, I have come to acknowledge why I did it and how to deal with my ‘addiction' to self-mutilation.

Medication didn't work. Traditional therapy didn't work. But being able to talk about it to friends and family was how I have learned to manage this illness. A HUGE part of that was the ability to overcome the stigma that society has placed on depression, self-mutilation and the self-destructive behaviours that are associated with it. Unlike a physical disease that contorts the body, mental illness is invisible and it is often impossible for other people to understand.

To be given the opportunity to speak about my experiences with depression and self-mutilation, and to show people that mental illness is not selective in whom it affects is very important to me. More than that, it gives me the opportunity to show other young people that this is something that can be effectively treated. I've since graduated from university, live independently, secured a fantastic career and have surrounded myself with amazing people. I am happy that I failed at two attempted suicides and I am even happier that I am able to share my story at a national level. While I still struggle with depression and unhealthy thoughts, I am committed to overcoming this illness one conversation at a time.

Love always. Meg.

For Aboriginal and non-Aboriginal youth suicide prevention resources, please visit: http://www.honouringlife.ca/.

For more information on the Mental health Commission of Canada, please visit: http://www.mentalhealthcommission.ca/Pages/index.html

My story of severe, recurrent major depression. Living and coming out of a sad world of detachment and loneliness.

My name is Jackie, I was diagnosed with severe, recurrent major depression just three years ago at the age of 42. I have always been depressed and lived my life in a sad world of detachment and loneliness. Being depressed does not necessarily mean having no optimism nor the lack of ability to overcome major difficulties, it's an ever-present feeling of heaviness in heart that in me, stunted my growth in all facets of my life.

What Does Depression Look Like?

Depression is an illness that is unseen by the naked eye, and unseen even under microscopic view. What people can't see, doesn't exist, unless you're the one suffering.

In 1998, at the age of 38, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and along with a mastectomy received six rounds of chemotherapy. The chemotherapy has changed my body chemistry causing my depression to become more severe and I have also been diagnosed with anxiety disorder, ADHD, and bipolar disorder. My world got darker (black actually in my mind). I saw no light and felt no light. I found a very good psychotherapist and it has taken 3 years to find the right combination of drugs (7 different drugs) that I take daily so that my brain chemistry functions as close to "normal" as possible.

Antidepressants and Psychiatric Medications Gave Me a Life

For me, taking antidepressant medication means the difference between staying in bed and getting out of bed in the morning. It means the difference between being able to get up after a difficult day, when I really just want to stay down; it means being able to focus enough to work my way through the difficulties of my life in order to achieve success (for me). It means having the desire to feel love and being able to openly admit that and learning how to give and receive love. It means the difference between laughing with exuberance for at least those moments when I laugh, than to not laugh at all - always being serious. It means being able to admit where my weaknesses are as a human being and being willing to do the work to change and experience the peace that comes from making that effort and achieving steps towards that goal.

Antidepressant Medications: Expectations vs. Reality

When I started the antidepressant medication, my expectations did not coincide with the reality of what the depression medication is meant to do. Others have brains whose chemistry releases in proper amounts at proper times from the proper places and the signals get sent to the proper destination eliciting the intended response for that part of the brain and circumstance. But those people still have to work at doing and being, becoming and evolving into who they were meant to be. I personally do not believe that antidepressants cause people to commit suicide or think more about suicide. I think they are administered by well-meaning physicians who have never experienced depression, don't know the actual physical feeling of the changes in the brain chemistry, don't understand what the person receiving the antidepressants expectations are (or the expectations of those around that person).

Someone who is depressed is already acutely aware that those around them consider them someone who falls short of where they should be as a person, and the person with depression has one foot in life and one foot out of life all the time. So when they take the medication and they don't understand that it will help them train their brain - not be a miraculous drug in the sense of being in euphoria or all-of-a-sudden having friends and/or meeting the expectations of those we love, yes, suicide would seem to be the answer. But I do not believe it is the drug.

We need very desperately to begin mentoring programs - programs where someone who is depressed but with antidepressant medication has learned what the potential of their brain is and is content with that; can provide a genuine acceptance, total understanding and validation to the person beginning on the meds; someone who knows exactly how they're feeling; is someone to call with those deep questions that others are afraid of and can help them to work thru them; which, in the meantime, is teaching them the skills to work thru everyday problems and major life crises in a way that fits the natural bent of their personality (not scientifically put together solutions).

I do not believe a counselor, psychotherapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist can do this part of the healing of process. The mentor should not take the place of any of the professionals, but work side-by-side with them so that all angles are covered for the person in need. If not, the depressed person is really still alone. (especially children ages 0-21). If anyone who reads this and is in a position to help begin such a mentoring program -or try one, please contact me at jlv998 AT yahoo.com. We lose children to depression, we don't need to lose them thru the medication that is supposed to -and absolutely can - help them.

Ed. note: This is a personal depression story and reflects this one individual's experience with depression and depression treatment. As always, we urge you to check with your doctor before making any changes in your treatment.

next: What's Wrong With My Son?
~ depression library articles
~ all articles on depression

I have suffered from Major Depression since the 1980's - although my parents would deny that. I'll go weeks feeling so sad and sometimes so empty. It's like being alone in a crowd of people that you don't fit in with.

When I'm home, I just curl up on the couch. Not interested in eating, don't really care what's on TV. Sometimes I prefer to have the lights off and will just sit in the dark. Most of the time I have trouble falling and staying asleep, and then, all day I'm exhausted. I just can't get the energy to do much of anything at work. Once I leave work and get home, I just don't want to do anything. I feel so sleepy and tired, but the scene just repeats every night - hours to fall asleep, waking all hours of the night, then exhaustion all day.

Daily Effects of Living with Major Depression

I always see my production number worsen when I have a episode of depression. The numbers are done monthly, and you can always tell when I am suffering just by looking at my yearly stats. It is so obvious. I start seeing myself as being worthless, I start isolating from my friends and family. I start telling my friends that they're better off without me because I'm wasting air and space. The usual stuff for a depressed person.

Then, the suicidal ideation comes on. I think I know just about everything there is to know about depression and suicide since I do TONS of research on it as I fall into that abyss. I have several websites I have saved about ways to commit suicide and what happens if you don't succeed. I save those stories to squelch the urge to kill myself.

Self-Harm Instead of Suicide

So, what did I find to do instead of kill myself? I cut (self-injure). When I find a place that I can get away with by using a usual excuse such as the cat, the fence, whatever. That's what I do. And it usually works, but it's not something I recommend. I fear I'm loosing my mind sometimes and start wondering if I'll just completely crack someday. Each episode seems worse than the last. And two a year is normal for me. Sometimes it's more, never less.

I've always known I've needed treatment for depression. And a few times I've gone. But it only lasts as long as it takes to turn down the severity. And I never take antidepressants. I just have this thing about adding more drugs to my system that I need to live a semi-normal life. The therapy is useless because I don't go long enough to accomplish anything. Of course this doesn't do anything in the long run. And essentially, I am beginning to never go back for depression treatment.

I have decided that I will live with what I have, push through the depression and the exhaustion until it decreases and things get easier. I cut, feel a bit better, still very depressed but without that suicidal edge. I don't know if that makes sense or not. But, I've decided to be one of those that no longer tries psychology, psychiatry, or pharmacology to get through the depression. I'm tired of those things, know that I won't stick with them, and go it alone. I tell nobody about how I feel or what I'm going through. The reason? I don't want to bring others down. And that is just who I am.

Julia

Ed. note: This is a personal depression story and reflects this one individual's experience with depression and depression treatment. As always, we urge you to check with your doctor before making any changes in your treatment.

next: I Just Call This 'To Hell and Back'
~ depression library articles
~ all articles on depression