I have had one hell of a week. It has been a week of emotional lows with very few highs. It has been a week where I have had to use all of my coping with depression skills.

Talking about depression can be scary. It was... is... scary for me, too. But I did it anyway. We all must talking about our depression, for ourselves, for our children, and for our children's children.

Post-vacation depression (or, post-vacation blues, as it is sometimes called) has often plagued me. I was hoping that this time it would be different. I just got back from a vacation in the sun. And now, it is all I can do to keep those depression demons off my back.

I have never been thin. Nor overly large (I hate the word "fat"). I'm 49 years old, I'm in perimenopause and lately, it seems like everything I put in my mouth ends up as another half pound on the scale. It's so depressing!

As a person who suffers from chronic depression, I know when depression is looming. And when depression looms, I've learned to go easy on myself. If I don't, a day or two of symptoms may turn into a major depressive episode.

It's the end of another year. I am happy to say that I had no major depressive episodes in 2013. Rather, I was able to manage my depression through, among other things, practicing positivity and gratitude. But the truth is, no manner of gratitude or positivity will fix depression. When you have depression, gratitude and positivity are two concepts that are simply too far out of reach. You know that there are an abundance of things to be grateful for, and that, if you could only remember them, things would seem far more positive. But, you simply haven't the energy or the frame of mind to list, count or comprehend what they are. That's why we need to cultivate gratitude and positivity during the good times.

A dismal day, especially around the holidays, can be a sure trigger for depression. Here in southern Ontario (Canada), where I live, we are having an ice storm. It's been freezing rain and ice pellets for over 24 hours and boy... is it ever dismal. But, even though winter can be so depressing, I've decided that I'm not going to let this cold, wet, treacherous weather trigger my depression or dampen my holiday spirit.

Low self-esteem can bring on depression. Having said that, depression also lowers self-esteem. It truly is a vicious cycle, one that I am trying very hard to manage.

The catalyst to my first bout of depression was almost thirteen years ago. That's when the official depression diagnosis was, anyway. That's not to say that I wasn't depressed before that. If I was, I didn't know I was. But that date marked the beginning of my journey to getting treatment for my depression.

Birthdays don't have to be depressing, do they? I celebrated my 49th birthday this past week and while I enjoyed a plethora of happy birthday wishes, I also dealt with an unexpected drop in my mood. It may be perfectly normal to be introspective around your birthday, to examine your life and consider your future options, but when those thoughts become repetitive and persistent, that's when you have to do something to break the cycle. (Depression Fuels Itself Through Negative Thoughts)