Recently I became very depressed for no apparent reason. My therapist and I decided I needed to be evaluated, and that's when the nightmare started. I live in a cluster apartment, so staff called hospital security to take me to the Crisis Intervention Unit (CIU). Hospital security said no officers were available, so staff called the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department. The police called for a medic, but both the medic and the police refused to transport me, saying that transporting me was hospital security's job. They made me sign a form refusing transportation, and said that all the psychiatric beds in Indy were taken. I was taken to the emergency room, evaluated, diagnosed with suicidal ideation, and sent home because there were no beds available.

One of the symptoms of borderline personality disorder is difficulty controlling impulses. Needless to say, this can sometimes lead to disastrous consequences for actions that make sense only to us. Last night, for example, as I looked out my second-story window, I saw a dumpster full of construction debris and felt an inexplicable urge to jump just to see what would happen. Thankfully I didn't, but impulsive, potentially self-damaging behavior can be a problem for people with borderline personality disorder.

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After last week's post, Gus123 had this to say: if a “regular doc” finds out one has a mental illness diagnosis, they will blame all one’s ills on “imaginary” causes, discounting one’s judgement and intellect, regardless of the true nature of thing. He hit the nail on the head. A study revealed that almost half of all patients with schizophrenia reported that their family doctors took their physical symptoms less seriously when the doctors were aware of the patient's psychiatric diagnosis. My experience is that they do the same for patients with borderline personality disorder.

There's talk of privatizing the state hospital system. That strikes me as a bad idea. We already have enough mental health services that run with a skeleton staff, minimal oversight, and an emphasis on the bottom line.

Dr. Marsha Linehan, best known for creating dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT), admitted in a New York Times article that she struggles with mental illness, once being called "one of the most disturbed patients in the hospital." She would diagnose her troubled  teenage self as having borderline personality disorder, or BPD. So why does this matter?

While a personality test is legal, a test designed for clinical diagnosis is not. Saterfiel and Associates explains "The courts have consistently ruled against the general use of those psychological assessments in the business environment. The use of clinically inclined instruments would also fly in the face of the Americans With Disabilities Act since they are mainly designed to diagnose abnormal behavioral patterns. The ADA states that an employer 'shall not conduct a medical examination or make inquiries as to whether such applicant is an individual with a disability or as to the nature and severity of such disability.'"

Some people believe that the term "borderline" is stigmatizing and inaccurate. Should BPD be renamed? If so, what should it be called?

Sometimes borderline personality disorder (BPD) can make us do extremely stupid things. A case in point happened after a heated argument with my mother. I stormed out of the house into a below-freezing night, with only one spare set of clothes (khaki pants and a short-sleeved T-shirt), very little money, and no plan. My mother's anger quickly turned into fear and when I returned the next day, I learned she'd considered filing a missing persons report.

One possible symptom of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is substance abuse. When a person has a substance abuse disorder and a psychiatric disorder, they have a dual diagnosis. While help exists for people with mental illness and for people with substance abuse problems, getting help for a dual diagnosis is a lonely, uphill battle. Simply put, neither psychiatric facilities nor rehabilitation facilities have the desire nore ability to treat us.