The Stigma of Being Bipolar

Hi Christina, I've been following your posts for a while and I must say they're so helpful! My husband is bipolar. We have kept it a secret from most people, besides our immediate family, because we've had negative experiences in the past when he opened up to one of our - supposedly! - good friends.
It's true - there still is a stigma with mental disorders and as long as people can't accept it as a medical condition, there will always be a stigma :(
Keep writin'!!

Dear Cristina,
I was diagnosed as bipolar about 15 years ago. Right now, I live a completely normal life with Lithium and Risperdal.

To be honest with you I used to think the same way. Both my parents and therapist told me to never tell anyone else about my Bipolar Disorder for fear of "misunderstanding" and potential abuse.
The fact is, we need to be open about our Bipolar Disorder (or other mental issues) because it is up to us to show the world that we are all humans. We need to put a human face onto mental illness and educate the population, regardless how hard it is, because without our voice too many people will go unnoticed, unchecked and unwanted.
When I finally told my closest friend that I was Bipolar, her first reaction was "Oh, one of my Exs was Biploar. I know about that." Instead of prodding me or berating me with pointless questions, she accepted my decision to tell her and we continued on. Our friendship was not dampened, but rather it actually became stronger because we could connect to each other and realize that well, life is not normal.
I understand, however, that this is a hard decision to make, but in my honest opinion it is one that more people should try. The fact that you are open about your Bipolar disorder in this blog is awesome, we need more people like you to spread the word.
Dave.

Well bipolar is challenging yes my mom is. Scary cause its genetic

I too was scared to tell people about having bipolar (I have bipolar I) but I knew that my episodes told a story of some sort that would leave people wondering what was wrong with me so I decided it was better that they know and learn about it then to think I was crazy. This way I was in control even though sometimes I could loose control or become depressed and not want to see anyone. Not telling people is not an option I don't think because they know something is wrong it just leaves them wondering and that is not healthy. Take charge of your life and don't be afraid, most people will understand, and those that don't well they weren't your real friends to begin with.

Hi everyone and especially Cristina Fender!
My real name is Helena Smole. I come from Slovenia (Eastern Europe). I was diagnosed 14 years ago. It takes time, but eventually you discover what other people in this discussion have said above already: You tell and you wait what happens. The "friends" that go away, because they cannot take it, are a waste of your time. I scared quite some guys away with my diagnosis, but the one that eventually married me is absolutely amazing. Thus the mental illness itself actually helped me pick the right guy. So again - the other guys were my waste if time.
The only exception would be a job interview. I would advise you to keep it a secret and tell later, when the boss and other colleagues at work get to know you as a personality. For the bipolar disorder has nothing to do with your personality. It's a bio-chemical imbalance in your brain. Like diabetes in a chemical imbalance in your blood.
You can read more about my life with the schizoaffective disorder (= mixture of schizophrenia and bipolar) in my blog: http://schizoaffective-helen.blogspot.com/
Or you can wait for a half a year or so and read my book that is curently beings illustrated.
My book concetrates on "inner de-stigmatisation" which in short means: "I love myself just the way I am, the mental illness included."
Self-medication is another thing though. I wouldn't even call it that way. I would say: "I am addicted to alcohol or illegal drugs. I will get professional help on this. Today."
Take care
Helena Smole (I am also on Facebook)

Great article. I, however, came out of my shell when diagnosed in 98 with Bipolar and have never looked back. I want everyone to know because I feel as if hiding behind something is lying and heck if I want to go through life that way. The other day at the grocery store I a lady in front of me was talking inappropriately about mental illness. I told her mental illness is no different then someone with cancer. It should be viewed the same way. She was rude, but I felt good that I got my point across. Looking forward to following you more.
Beth Hoffhanker on Facebook

I made the mistake of telling some of my co workers and from then on I was never treated the same. In fact, I later resigned because of it.

I am sorry you made that mistake. You took a big chance and were sorely disappointed by these people. At least you had the guts...
I would not tell too many people because of the stigma attached. I have had neighbors treat me poorly after they knew, as well as close friends dumping me (in my early 20s before people understood anything about the illness). Not that people wouldn't have run away today. I'll never know.
It is fear that propels people to stay away. People may not mean to be stupid regarding mental illness; it is not understood well. Some people may think you should tell everyone because you are doing a disservice to yourself and others with the disease. Sometimes I think that, but I fought enough battles with being bipolar and agoraphobic, I don't need the added burden of explaining myself to people who just don't get it. They never will get it unless they have the illness or they intimately know someone with it. Support groups are probably the best way to vent/get information.
A very big hug to you....