Parents of Mentally Ill Children Have a Long and Difficult Journey

Hi all. Thank you all for sharing your real thoughts and stories. I have a 12 year old with GAD, learning issues, possibly ADHD (finding out today), sensory issues, etc. My 17 year old struggles with depression and anxiety as well. I have been on anxiety meds for about 10 years now as well. I blame myself that the girls got this from me. I am also sad and discouraged that this will continue with my youngest especially for a long time, possibly her lifetime. I too have felt I wish it was all over..exhausted. Both girls are on medication and see therapists. 12 year old is started to "embellish or lie"..had DCF called this weekend saying we hit her (which is a lie). So hard because we love them so much. They get so much love and attention from us. I know a counselor will help me too. It's just so heavy sometimes. Thank you that I'm not alone. God has a reason for all this.

Thanks for sharing ur expirience let me tell u mine a book can be written about my life i fall and rise three times i was mentally ill when i was 18 just weeks before entering a prestigous university in the country addis ababa university in electrical engineering i joined weeks after dropped out i start medication it was painful it was difficult to accept i couldn't beleive it was real i stayed home for five years without work or education full of painful moments all friends left me my father and mother are not able to educate me in a private college i come from a poor family i waited until my elder brother graduated and get a good job then i started education and managed to graduate with good GPA it's not easy to graduate strugling with pain i felt it was a sucess quickly i started work but the work was not situable for me it was stressful i quit then i told my self what is my future if i am not able to work i gave up then i decided to commit suicide just seconds before i prayed to God then i survived again i stayed home for two years i'm an orthodox christian i usually go to church and pray one day God helped me made the impossible possible i got a work which is not stressful and co-workers who understand my situation i 'm still working

My son is adopted right at birth. I saw him born; I held bio mom's hand when she had him, and I cut his cord. He is my baby. 10 years old now. Beautiful , smart, funny, and mentally ill. ADHD(minor diagnosis), conduct disorder, and disruptive mood dysregulation disorder. Dr says criminal mastermind in there. I too pray 100 times a day for sure.

I want to share my experience with DMDD and how after almost 8 years, we found help. (He was also adopted from birth)
Our lives, and the life of my daugher, centered around my son's explosions, which began in infancy. He often had several a day, and there was never a day without at least one. We didn't go places or do things that other families did, because normal activities were simply impossible. After almost 8 years of this, I hardly felt human.
We had tried every method we could find. We tried therapists and a well known children's center and got a diagnosis of ODD, but the diagnosis didn't help. We were getting frightened that his behavior would be even more difficult to manage as he got older and stronger, and had no idea what to do.
When our son was almost 8, we became worried about his progress as school. It was becoming clear that he was not able to focus or express himself as well as his peers. This lead to a neuropsych evaluation, and we finally had a useful diagnosis: DMDD, ADHD, and some processing disorders. Stumbling onto these diagnoses seemed miraculous. It gave us names for his issues, and a clear path to follow.
1: We started seeing a psychiatrist. She prescribed Guanfacine, a blood pressure medication, instead of going directly to ADHD meds. Just 1.5 mgs was enough to keep him from bouncing off the walls without making him a zombie. He still had plenty of energy, but his mood was awful, and nights were spend raging and smashing things while we held his door shut. We added a tiny bit of Prozac (just 4mg), and after a week, we had an entire day without an explosion. Then we had another, and another.
2: We also worked with a behaviorist and learned methods for dealing with this kind of extreme behavior. The methods we had tried before may work well for children with ordinary tantrums, but for someone with a mood disorder, they had no effect.
It's been a month now, and he's a different kid. He's had a few tantrums, but we know how to manage them and they are rare and for reasons we can understand. They are very different from explosions. He's clearly relieved that his life is happier, and we still can't believe the change.

Here, here Angela!

They sure do unfortunately.

I was looking at these post and they are from years ago. I am a single parent and my kid is an only child . It’s 2019 and I’ve been dealing with my now 21 yr old for years with her being defiant, rude, disrespectful, and down right distructive. I’m at my end and can’t deal with her anymore. I have been looking for health for years and always told that it’s her choice to get help. She has been inhaling cans for years, one minute she’s “normal” then the next she’s back on pills , marijuana.she doesn’t want medication and so I’ve tried over the counter natural things and she still refuses to take it. We’ve gone to counseling, therapist, at least 3 times in a mental ward with police contact and here we are still doing the same thing. I reach out for help and they say , she has to want to get help and of course she doesn’t think there’s a problem. I can’t take it!!!!! I can’t continue to live my life this way. I have asked her to leave several times and sometimes she says fine and she leaves for a few hours and then she comes back . I don’t like to not her back in because I don’t want her to cause a scene in front of neighbors. I have thought about going back to couseling alone because I don’t know what to do other than put her out, get a restraining order and just wash my hands of her.

I know this is an old post, but I can’t find any help for my almost 15 year old daughter. She has been diagnosed with dmdd at age 9, but also has other issues. I don’t want to go into details too much, but with the school closure, she has gotten worse. She hasn’t done any online school, stopped taking care of herself, doesn’t see anybody. She has no friends or siblings. The school doesn’t want to help and say it’s a home problem and she needs counseling. She doesn’t want to go for counseling and because she’s 14 no doctor will see ne alone regarding her issues. No one will come to our home to help us. I need to send her to live elsewhere but even a lawyer can’t help me with that. I can’t afford a therapeutic boarding school and school doesn’t want to send her. My life is very difficult. My daughter doesn’t think there is anything wrong with her, never wanted to take meds. We tried countless supplements that we sneaked into food. I just need someone to come and help me. My daughter hates me and yet she is super attached to me and dependent upon me. She is very smart in. A Way, and in other ways she’s like. 2 year old and won’t do anything for herself. She screams snd cries, won’t let me comfort her, is stuck on ideas, very rude, destructive, manipulative, sad, depressed, etc.