Life After Mental Illness

I think it is important to remember that mental illness doesn’t need to be a life sentence. If Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor can essentially re-train her brain to repair itself after a major stroke, we should all be able to re-train our brains in a way as to allow us to battle, and overcome, mental illness.

I understand that many mental illnesses are considered ‘life-long.’ And that sufferers may never again get to experience joy in the same way they once did. But I also see that thinking that way can become a very dangerous self-fulfilling prophecy; if you see yourself living the rest of your life suffering from mental illness, the odds are forever stacked against you.

I Can't Believe You're Still Alive

I was the perfect example of what many people would consider a hopeless case. Still, when I return to my hometown and see someone I haven’t seen in ten years, I often hear ‘Crazy Chris Curry! I can’t believe you’re still alive!’

I typically reply with ‘neither can I.’

I attempted suicide the first time at age 15. I was a rampant drug abuser by age sixteen. I was a full blown drug addict by age 18 and was locked away in a psychiatric hospital for three months at age 19.

For years after that hospitalization, I had so much nerve damage from the massive amounts of medication that they had me on that my eyes twitched and darted on their own; my arms would spasm out of control; my legs would twitch and shift. Technically, it’s called Tardive Dyskinesia, caused by anti-psychotic medication.

Sure, they eventually stifled my psychotic delusions, but caused me to physically look like a ‘crazy person’ for years afterward.

An Absolute Mental Horror Show

My personal life was in shambles for years. I was trapped in a dysfunctional relationship. I had dropped out of college, twice. I worked menial jobs and would always either get fired or quit after a few months. My main pastime between the ages of 14 and 24 was contemplating different ways of killing myself. I was a mess, an absolute mental horror show.

But six years later, I am a fully-functioning member of society. I work as a therapist, author, mental health advocate and musician. I am also in a long-term, highly functional relationship with someone as equally inspired by mental health matters as I. But if you told anyone that knew me ten years ago about who I am today, they would never be able to believe that I ended up, well, happy.

Choosing the Power of Choice

I could have been a hopeless case. I could have been mentally ill for the rest of my life. But I chose not to. I chose to not be a victim of my own mind anymore. Through the power of cognitive behavioural therapy, rational emotive behavioural therapy, choice theory and educating myself about my issues and empowering myself with education, I would today never dream of describing myself as mentally ill.

And everyone can get to that point. If Dr. Taylor can rebuild her brain after a major stroke, you can re-build yours after a major mental illness.

The Completely in Blue website is here. Chris is also on Google+, Twitter and Facebook.