How Verbal Abuse from Fathers Affects Sons

I was always told to "hurry up" as a little boy and I "wasn't moving fast enough to suit me (my father)" . It was a joke that my middle name was "hurry up Eric". Considering that my parents divorced at the age of two after a verbally and physically abusive marriage, mostly over my father's job loss and the fact he never wanted kids, and a older brother that resented me being born ( he began wetting the bed after I was born).
Do you think this would cause me to have problems then and possibly into adulthood ?

Hi Cheryl,
My father was a really practical man with his hands whereas I hated this type of work. He was a senior rank in the fire brigade so was often dressing up like a peacock in full uniform.
I was told unless I did well at school I would end up being a dustman (trash man) and he taunted me with this very often. I was also mocked by him if I showed emotions with my father calling me "Jennifer" (a girls name that had no other significance) if I was hurt or upset etc.
I was the middle child of three age wise the other two being sisters.
If my father thought I was bad he would take me into the garden and whip me with a belt (he never touched my sisters).
My youngest sister remembers my mother sobbing whilst watching my father beating me but, my Mother never ever intervened at any point ever.
I have grown up a successful man work wise based on my being terrified to fail after my childhood taunting.
I recall my sisters telling me in adult life that they were surprised at my helping my father whenever I could considering how cruel he was to me, so I assume things were worse than I can remember (I do not recall much of my childhood which I am told by my therapist is my brain blocking horrible memories to keep me safe.
I realise also now that my father was a narcissist as it was always about him and his arrogance conforms with all I have read on the subject.
I did start drinking alcohol at around 13 years old (Cider initially) and I stopped alcohol at the age of 60 years old and found I was unstable with hypervigilance, anxiety, recurring thoughts, negative thinking etc which I believe after research that drinking alcohol was due to my need to "self medicate" and numb my emotions.
Sorry this is a long ramble but I wanted to explain how an awful parent can destroy a life due to his own mental health issues, which sad as it is is not the victims fault.
Thank you for you site.

Hello Cheryl,
Thank you for this article. I'm 30 years old and after reading your article I can say that the root cause of my lack of self esteem and anxiety is due to my father. I also feel this is the reason why I have no desire to get married or have children. I guess I'm scared of turning into him.
My father was an okay father when he wanted to but I always felt he had anger issues and a drinking problem. He was always a hard worker in all of his jobs but he was easily irritated over the smallest things. Growing up in a Mexican household, we had tortillas with all of our meals and I remember once were he was mad that the tortillas that my mom was cooking were too hot. He yelled at my mom and demanded a cold tortilla to eat. I witnessed many times where he would verbally and physically attack my mom. I remember I would hide in my room and pretend I was asleep and wrap a pillow around my ears. As a child I don't remember crying when I was hiding but as I'm typing this, a few tears are running down my face.
My relationship with my father now is okay. We do talk to each other but I don't feel a connection like a father and son should have. I have a lot of resentment towards him and I prefer to not be around him much. I hate that all of his friends and family think he's a wonderful and helping person, if only they knew who he really was. Anyways, I guess that's life.
Thank you again and I look forward to reading more of your resources. Just this article has helped me tremendously.