As I walk through the day hospital to attend a new cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) program, I feel a sense of embarrassment and shame. I wonder and search within myself to only ask, “How has it come to this?” As I stop by the nurse’s station to ask for directions to find my way to the group, I cannot help but sense that they must be assessing and judging me. There is a great deal of mental health stigma when accessing mental health resources for the purpose of rehabilitation and I believe a great majority of us have felt it at one time or another.
Dealing with Stigma
It seems more often these days that celebrities are coming out and admitting to the world that they have a mental illness (Do Celebrity Disclosures of Mental Illness Help End Stigma?). Some people feel that celebrities are glamorizing the issue and not demonstrating the realities of a person who lives with a mental illness (Is Having A Mental Illness A Gift?). However, I consider this act of honesty to be both empowering and courageous because their voices are not only prominent, but most importantly influential.
When you have a mental illness, particularly bipolar disorder, your moods can alter rapidly, gradually or barely at all during periods of your life. It all depends on the individualized experience of the person who has the illness. Quite often, we self-stigmatize our emotions and ask, “Am I actually feeling a certain way because of my own pure emotions, or am I experiencing these emotions because of my mental illness?”
We all know that being a youth can be a rewarding journey with growth and plenty to learn, however, it can also be a very difficult and confusing time. It can mean being a bully or being the brunt of bullying at school and it can also spell doom and gloom for many youth that feel they do not fit in due to having a mental illness. Through these difficult times, can you imagine also having to deal with a mental health condition, which brings on mental health stigma?
I know plenty of people who have a mental illness, including myself, and quite often there is a recurring theme of stigma in our relationships with our significant other; where we often feel like a burden to our partner, and when treated poorly, we tend to discern that we do not deserve any better. Having a mental illness can negatively affect your self-esteem and self-worth, which is often reflected in the way we view ourselves and we quite often accept a partner’s behavior that negatively affects our well-being.
There is so much pain in self-stigma, especially when it comes to our body image and looking in the mirror. We often hate ourselves because we have a mental illness, not realizing that we are not a terrible embodiment of our illness. We are simply people that have struggles and face unique challenges stemming from our mental illness. For example, being tired all the time, being overweight because of medication, and even being unable to work. We seem to give up on the belief that one day things will be better and fail to trust that others will understand us. I have learned that life has many surprises in store for us and, at times, we may just get to understand that we are not exactly what we see in the mirror.
Mental health stigma affects all people differently and it is particularly unique when you are experiencing mental illness as a man. Men are raised to be tough, dependable, and the majority of men may even find it difficult to express emotion. There is prominent stigma in our society that tells men who have a mental illness that they simply just have to "suck it up."
Have you heard of the term self-stigma? Once you are diagnosed with a mental illness, many people feel that they are somehow tainted, mostly because of mental health stigma. Not only do they feel this outwardly, but also in how they perceive their internal sense of who they are as a person. It is not uncommon to experience shame of having a mental illness, and instead of knowing that you are a person who has an illness, you often forget you are not someone who is the illness. This is at the center of self-stigma.
There is a certain underlying stigma in society that is strong, impactful, and often devastating for many people who live with a mental illness in the workplace. Not only are particular professions extra stigmatizing for the person involved, but there is this false idea lingering out there that the person employed is somehow unworthy, their skills are questionable, and they are often pushed out of their position.
The most prevalent question I receive from my Bipolar Babe peer support group participants is, “I met a wonderful guy/girl and she/he wants to take me out on a date, so do I tell them that I have a mental illness?” It’s a valid question and a concern that many people have right from the start, with good reason. It can be scary telling someone, anyone, for the first time that you have a mental illness due to the stigma that exists in society. In my personal experience, and hearing stories from others, mental health stigma and intimate relationships can spell doom and gloom, or they can provide a positive platform for empowerment and honesty.