Ahh Valentine’s Day. A whole day traditionally devoted to celebrating love. And as it is quickly approaching, my thoughts turn to relationships, all sorts of different ADHD relationships, and how ADHD can be a test for even the strongest connections. When I work with adults, often the focus of our coaching sessions turns to a request for the best ways to handle conflicts with partners. I often hear these concerns:

Hiya, friends. I’m Elizabeth Prager, an almost 30-year-old gal with between ten and twenty white hairs. More than half of them spawned this summer during cadaver lab in my first semester of Physical Therapy school here in Maryland. I live with my lovely spouse, who will someday save the world, and my two cats, both of whom are constantly seeking to overthrow the current power structure. One really important thing about me: I’m obsessed with Iceland.

A few months ago, I wrote about “tipping points:” ..a time in people’s lives when the strategies they have been using to compensate for their ADHD challenges no longer seem to be working.  This “tipping point” is often experienced along with feelings of overwhelm and chaos.  Up until a “tipping point,” people have been able to balance known or unknown challenges with ADHD with strategies they may not have even realized they were using.  Up until the “tipping point,” they had been able to adapt and cope well with their symptoms, even going as far as being under the radar for an official diagnosis of ADHD (in other words their symptoms were not interfering with their functioning). But for some reason a life change – it could be a job promotion, relationship change, a school change, or any myriad of different things – renders the current strategies ineffective and over time there is a sense that things are no longer “going well” and in fact, life seems to be falling apart in a big way. This article really resonated with people. I received many emails from readers stating they had coasted along most of their life, never knowing they had ADHD until they changed jobs or had kids (the overwhelm and chaos that children bring seems to be one of the biggest tipping points). Yet once they read the article, it all made sense- they had ‘tipped over’ and were floundering with no idea why or how to right themselves.

My favorite radio stations are playing carols, greeting cards are arriving in my mailbox and more and more houses are twinkling as I drive home at night. It’s official – the holidays are here. I’ve been thinking about the holidays and how to write a blog about best tips to survive and enjoy them if you or a loved one has ADHD. Then I started reminiscing about past seasons with my children and decided to go a different route. To celebrate the joys that ADHD can bring this time of year:

When you think of September, what comes to mind? Crisp notebooks, new backpacks, sharp pencils with brand new erasers, reconnecting with friends, running around at afterschool sports and activities, enjoying recess and gym. Or Remembering the ADHD medication, morning madness, battling homework, trying to pay attention, talking with teachers, scheduling this year’s 504 or IEP meetings.

It’s been a few weeks since the Succeed with ADHD Telesummit and my mind has finally quieted. All those tips and strategies, plus the energy and excitement of the listeners and speakers, had my brain fired up. I wanted to implement everything at once and make changes in my life right away! All those great ideas buzzing in my head, all the ‘I have to do that’, created such noise that I didn’t know where to start. Often when there is too much, there’s no clear path on what to do and where to go. So I stepped away and focused on other projects. Then last week, I downloaded the recordings and listened to each of the calls again with the goal of choosing one or two strategies that I can do right now (with the plan of listening to the recordings again in a few months for more ideas). Here are some of the key points and “ahas” I plan to add in my life right now:

Just as there are many different ways that adult ADHD shows up in our lives, there are also many different ways to manage and succeed with ADHD. What works for someone else may not be the best strategy for you…or is it? Today’s article contains an overview of ten unique approaches to effective ADHD management, or ways you can succeed with ADHD, followed by an invitation to join me in a no-cost ADHD telesummit. There will be presentations from some of the top ADHD experts and professionals from our community, who will teach you more about each technique and how to make it work for you. I know from these experts you will find at least one strategy that is just right for you, or more likely, several in combination that will make all the difference. Enjoy!

Last month I wrote a post about finding the right work to fit with ADHD symptoms. One reader, Jeff, wrote in to state that he found journalism to be a fantastic career for him because there is "lots of variety [and journalism] allows for spontaneous changes in direction throughout the day." I like Jeff's thinking on this issue because as the DSM IV states, I "often [have] trouble keeping attention on tasks or play activities." So, like Jeff, I prefer a lot of variety in my day as well as some spontaneity.

Recently, I’ve noticed a pattern in my clients that I call the “tipping point”.  The “tipping point” is basically a time in people’s lives when, for various reasons, the strategies they have been using to compensate for their ADHD challenges no longer seem to be working.  This “tipping point” is often experienced along with feelings of overwhelm and chaos.  Up until a “tipping point,” people have been able to balance known or unknown challenges with ADHD with strategies they may not have even realized they were using.  Up until the “tipping point”, they had been able to adapt and cope well with their symptoms, even going as far as being under the radar for an official diagnosis of ADHD (in other words their symptoms were not interfering with their functioning). But for some reason a life change – it could be a job promotion, relationship change, a school change, or any myriad of different things – renders the current strategies ineffective and over time there is a sense that things are no longer “going well” and in fact, life seems to be falling apart in a big way.

Admittedly, I'm late. Again. Instead of making an excuse, let's just say that at 40, I'm more aware of my inability to accurately gauge time. It is a symptom of my ADHD, but it is not an excuse. As a kid, I didn't know that I had ADHD, but now that I am aware, a number of events from childhood forward make a lot of sense. I'll share an example and what I have learned as well as how I continue to struggle with timeliness.