Introduction to Randall Law, Author of 'Creative Schizophrenia'
I’m Randall Law, the co-author of the blog, Creative Schizophrenia. I’m an often clueless father of three, a work in progress husband to one, a rabid sports fanatic and an unemployed physician assistant learning to live with schizophrenia while renovating a farmhouse built in 1910.
Randall Law Has a History of Psychosis, Anxiety and Depression
I’ve struggled with mental illness since I was sexually abused at age nine. This traumatic experience commenced a journey down a path of debilitating anxiety and depression that terminated in psychosis. Environmental factors gave way to genetic factors, and my mental illness morphed. I first heard voices when I was in high school. My first visit to the psychiatric unit came two years later after I nearly took my own life. The psychiatrist told me I was paranoid. I told him I wasn’t. I didn’t tell him about the voices I heard; I didn’t understand them. I left the hospital and dumped my medications; I told no one. My schizophrenia was a secret.
After 7 years, I Sought Help
I endured seven years without medication. They weren’t stable years, but I persevered. After graduating with an undergraduate degree in biology and a graduate degree in physician assisting, I thought the worst was behind me; I had achieved the stability I so desperately craved. My stability crumbled the day I began practicing medicine. Two months later, car keys in hand, I planned to drive to the airport so I could commandeer an airplane to fly to a deserted island. Instead, I approached my supervising physician and simply pleaded, “I need help.”
Randall Law's Goal for 'Creative Schizophrenia'
I became a physician assistant because I enjoy helping others. I am not capable of practicing medicine right now because of my schizophrenia, but I hope to help others through my writing. I hope my words make you laugh. I hope they make you cry. I hope they help you to appreciate your life more fully. I hope they do the same for me. If you read my writing, I hope it makes a difference. I hope it helps you feel alive. I want to feel alive.
More About Randall Law and What He Wants for 'Creative Schizophrenia'
Learn more about Randall Law.
APA Reference
Law, R.
(2019, January 10). Introduction to Randall Law, Author of 'Creative Schizophrenia', HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, May 5 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/creativeschizophrenia/2019/1/introduction-to-randall-law-author-of-creative-schizophrenia
Author: Randall Law
I don't know you but thank you for sharing your experience Randall. I can't imagine what this has been like for you but I am so grateful that you have the courage to document it. Based off of your writing and video I believe you have been blessed with the gift of endurance that will bolster you as you set out to bless the lives of those around you through your blog.
You said that the day you started practicing medicine your stability crumbled. Can I ask, what that meant for you? I am not familiar with schizophrenia personally except for what I have been taught in textbooks and am seeking greater understanding. Any insight you could give me would be much appreciated. If you wish to address this in a future blog rather than addressing me personally that is totally fine and I will keep an eye out for it.
Thank you again for your time and consideration.
Thank you for reading and for your comments, Peter. I especially appreciate your comments regarding endurance. I often feel the exact opposite about my situation and struggle with the thought that I could have kept fighting and pushed through it. I will answer your question more thoroughly in future posts, but I have no problem explaining my stability crumbling in brief. I have struggled tremendously with paranoia since high school. I can take a harmless comment completely out of context and twist it until I am convinced that the individual in question is plotting against me. When my paranoia gets out of control, the voices and intrusive thoughts become uncontrollable as well. I was so used to living with voices in my head that I really didn't recognize their presence until they became crippling. The morning I started practicing medicine it was as if I had driven into a deep fog. I could not focus and I could not control my anxiety and paranoia. I became convinced that my patients were out to get me. I stopped sleeping and lost my appetite. When I did sleep, the nightmares were horrendous. The voices in my head began to argue so loudly that it was hard to even hear patients over them. I couldn't formulate even the simplest medical opinion without the voices battling me. I struggled with my symptoms for two months before I found myself listening to particularly troubling voices and contemplating their commands. I knew my own diagnosis about two weeks before that, but I was convinced that I was being watched and monitored. It certainly was a frightening time and it continues to be a daily struggle, albeit a less severe one. I hope that answers your question! If you have any more, feel free to let me know. I will also be exploring what it is like to personally experience psychosis in detail in future posts.
Thank you so much Randall for going into greater detail regarding the thoughts and feelings associated with the loss of your stability. The events you went through sound horrific and the voices you battle are harrowing. By developing greater understanding I hope I will be able to better empathize with those around me suffering with similar afflictions. I also want to serve in the medical field for my career. I do not have any more questions at the moment but I will let you know if any arise and I will stay tuned for further updates on your blog.
Thank you for your response Peter. I wish you the best in your pursuit of serving in the medical field and hope my posts will continue to be informative for you!
I'm not doing this for the Amazon card entry, I'm doing it because it just needs to be done, like what you're doing. I just want to say, you've got stones my friend. I have a lot of respect and admiration for what you are doing with this, the house, your family, your life. Keep up the good work.
Thank you Brandon! Respect and admiration mean a lot coming from someone who I have a lot of respect and admiration for.
Great work Randall. You have always been masterful in speaking and writing. What a great way to use your talents to bring this important topic to light. In today's world there are few if any who have not either personally struggled with mental health or watched a loved one struggle with it.
Thank you for reading and for your friendship Jared. I completely agree with your thoughts. Whether you choose to term it mental illness or not, I believe that every individual will struggle to maintain their mental health at some point.
Randall, I have always admired your talents and abilities. I especially admire your courage to be open about your struggles and successes. Your thoughts will help strengthen, educate, and encourage others. I think the best way to help change stigmas is through opening up, listening to what is being said, and learning from each other. Thank you for being willing, and brave enough, to be a catalyst for the change.
Thank you for your kind comments Robin! I agree that the best way to end stigma is through two way communication. It seems that many of us like to talk (myself included), but few of us expend much energy listening.
Randall, thank you for sharing. I am in awe of your vulnerability and courage to speak openly. I believe you will truly change and bless peoples lives with this blog. Dakota and I currently work with teenage girls struggling with a wide array mental illness. I look forward to sharing your insight and blog with them and their families. Keep fighting the fight! You are worth it.
Thank you for reading and for your kind comments TeNeal. It sounds like you and Dakota are doing a great thing! Thank you for bringing awareness to mental illness and for helping others with their battle.