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What NOT to Say to Kids for Building Self-Esteem

July 17, 2013 Emily Roberts MA, LPC

Many parents make mistakes when attempting to soothe or console their children. Rather than building their self-esteem, they hinder it. The long-term effects include the child either feeling invalidated or the child doesn't develop the skills needed to handle certain situations as adults.

In the self-esteem video below, you'll discover what to say when soothing a child and how to say it. It is an easy skill to learn.

How to Say It Right

Emily is the author of Express Yourself: A Teen Girls Guide to Speaking Up and Being Who You Are.You can visit Emily’s Guidance Girl website. You can also find her on Facebook, Google+ and Twitter.

APA Reference
Roberts, E. (2013, July 17). What NOT to Say to Kids for Building Self-Esteem, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, November 28 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/buildingselfesteem/2013/07/what-not-to-say-to-kids-for-building-self-esteem



Author: Emily Roberts MA, LPC

Emily is a psychotherapist, she is intensively trained in DBT, she the author of Express Yourself: A Teen Girls Guide to Speaking Up and Being Who You Are. You can visit Emily’s Guidance Girl website. You can also find her on FacebookGoogle+ and Twitter.

Dave Halper, MA, LMFT
July, 18 2013 at 11:31 am

Nice job on explaining how kids often perceive well-intentioned messages from their parents. Nice casual delivery style to.

Dave Halper, MA, LMFT
July, 24 2013 at 5:22 am

Nice job on explaining how kids often perceive well-intentioned messages from their parents. Nice casual delivery style to.

In reply to by Anonymous (not verified)

July, 24 2013 at 5:24 am

Thanks Dave! I appreciate it. I think a lot of parents and adults can change their words and their message becomes much more well received by kids.

Sunrise Guided Visualizations
July, 22 2013 at 7:43 pm

Thank you for teaching this! Children are sponges - their subconscious minds absorb these negative messages.
It seems that it takes 10 positives to overcome just one negative comment. Avoiding the negatives is so important! Thank you!

Samantha Ueno
March, 12 2014 at 8:07 pm

very good tips, thought this would just be another "stating the obvious" video about why not to insult and berate your child. These are common mistakes that even those of us with the best intentions make.

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