Extroverts Can Experience Social Anxiety, Too

Hi Simon,
Being an extrovert with social anxiety is quite a challenge, isn't it? Therapy definitely can be very helpful. So can medication. That said, everyone is so different which means that medication works differently for everyone. There isn't one single medication that works great for everyone, and often it's a matter of trial and error between you and your doctor in order to find the right one for you. Further complicating matters is that medication does work well for many people, but it doesn't work well (or even has a reverse effect, making anxiety worse) for others. Because medication can work, it's worth having a conversation with your doctor.
I do agree with the people who tell you that social anxiety disorder is treatable. Sometimes it completely disappears. Other times, people can reduce it to the point where it's nothing more than an annoyance that they can deal with with tools and strategies learned in therapy or gained with life experience. Therapy is typically very helpful for social anxiety.
Keep doing what your doing, and perhaps even talk to your doctor about medication. And keep talking to people, reading information, etc. You're on the right track to overcoming anxiety and panic!

Hello Ggirl27,
You're definitely not the only one, and I have a feeling many readers will relate to and appreciate what you shared. What's the smallest number you need to feel like you have a tribe (great word for this concept, by the way)? Would you be happy starting with a tribe of two (you and another person with whom you develop a close friendship)? Or three? Or four? Knowing this can be a helpful starting point in building your tribe. If you feel content with a small number, you can grow comfortable there and gradually, and naturally through connections and activities, increase the size of your tribe. Just a thought! Good luck to you. It might be uncomfortable and difficult at times, but it's possible!

Hello Sena,
You seem to be very aware of yourself, and when it comes to any type of anxiety, that's a very good thing. Being aware of who you are, what bothers you, what thoughts and emotions you have, etc. makes it easier to identify whether something is causing significant disruptions in your life. The things you describe can definitely be components of social anxiety, and they can also be bothersome thoughts/feelings/behaviors that are disruptive but fall short of social anxiety disorder. Mental health diagnoses are frustratingly complex! Social anxiety actually exists on a spectrum. You might find helpful information in this article: http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/anxiety-schmanxiety/2014/03/social-anxiety-a-spectrum-f…
I think your thoughts of wanting to see a psychologist is a very good idea. Psychologists and other therapists/counselors can really help people sort out difficulties and come to understand them as well as what to do about them. Many schools have counselors; if yours does, stopping into his/her office could be a great start. People see counselors for many different reasons, and no one would have any idea why you are talking with the counselor.
HealthyPlace has some psychological tests, including one for social anxiety: http://www.healthyplace.com/psychological-tests/social-anxiety-social-phobia-test/ Online tests aren't official diagnostic tests, and the results aren't a diagnosis (or the ruling out of one). Any online test is designed to help people narrow down their symptoms and experiences and to be used as a discussion tool with a professional. Think of these tests as part of the journey to finding answers rather than the answers themselves.
Truly, you are already on the right track toward overcoming social anxiety, whether or not it is classified as a disorder (only in-person visits with a mental health professional can determine that). You are aware of some things that are causing you difficulties, you are curious about what, exactly, is going on, and you are actively seeking answers. While that doesn't immediately end your anxiety, it's the right path to doing just that. You're already taking charge of yourself, so congratulate yourself!

Hi Max,
Welcome to the comments. :) Anxiety is quite personal. Some experience it intermittently, while others feel it almost constantly. Sometimes medication is necessary to regulate it, and other times it can be managed without it. It's great that you asked about others' experiences with anxiety. I'll stop answering and leave it open to discussion from others!

I get anxiety all the time. Getting a little better though. I am mostly an introvert. To feel better, I need to run. Sometimes longer miles such as 12-14. I am lucky.

Holy shit Max, you've hit the nail on the head for me, and I am currently in a funk myself, and thats exactly what I call them...or a rutt. This would be the third time I've fallen into a funk in the last 3 years, my first one also being when I was 20. This being a time when I finally swallowed my pride and acknowledged I there wasn't something right. I am soon turning 23.
Before all this I always had moments of social anxiousness however when I finally was removed from the situation, I could shift my gears back a lot easier, not ruminate about it and get on with being my funny, intuitive and opinionated self (not my words either). In a way it was like I ignored I had an issue, or swept it under the rug. But I guess when I fell into my first funk, that is when it all caught up to me and grew into a more generalised lasting effect.
When I have gotten back to my normal extroverted self post these funks, its such a good feeling, however the fear of of my anxious personality is always in the back of my mind with a voice saying "i could take you over at any time". I call it (Amy). My emotional wellbeing determines how well I can manage her, but normally these funks I've fallen into have stemmed from a situation, in which I feel in such a vulnerable situation over an extended period of time that I can't escape. For example the trigger of what I'm going through as the moment being when I was recently travelling.
The intermittence of this and therefore comparison of when I'm anxious and insecure to my fun confident likeable self who doesn't take life too seriously makes it so complex for me to deal with this. I'm often labelled as a 'people person' and having 'the gift of the gab' yet currently feel i am none of these. My experience holds me back from reaching things I have a lot of potential in and are normally second natured to me.
So mate, definitely can relate i think, and would be willing to talk more about it. This is the first time I've ever made a post on a forum, that being because what you wrote is the first time I've ever considered the someone may be having a very similar experience of social anxiety to me.
Cheers

I guess today's my lucky day. I've read a lot of social anxiety forums without ever commenting, but I feel the urge to actually leave a reply here since this is the first time I've come across not just one but TWO posts that really describe my situation.
I'm 21, a soon-to-graduate university student, part time raging extrovert and part time socially anxious. I had my first funk when I was 18 which lasted about two months, after which it comes back every year or so for similar lengths of time. Much like you, outside these funky periods I'm very outgoing and funny - I tend to find myself at the centre of attention at most social situations firstly because I enjoy it to the extent that I basically get off on it, and also because people like to put me there.
But as soon as the funk hits, my ability to hold conversations goes out the window and I begin to avoid social interactions altogether because they make me so anxious. At its worst, all the isolation and anxiety make me depressed and I question my own identity - who was that ball of fun, and where has he gone?
I bounce back from each funk relatively quickly (~two months) and, weirdly, seem to come back even more extroverted than I was before the funk. I think I've managed to get out of these funks so far thanks to the nature of student life (you're constantly surrounded by people) which means I'm forced to speak to people despite the crippling anxiety, and eventually I get rewired and return to my outgoing self.
It's quite telling that I'm experiencing a longer funk than usual at the moment, which happens to be at the end of my degree when I actually just don't have to see many people at all. So I think being forced to be around people because of some commitment (a degree, a job) isn't just good but NEEDED for getting out of these funks, and isolation is no good, especially for an extrovert.
Max & Cooper, do you get out of these funks completely randomly or are there any triggers that jolt you back into being extroverted?

Hi Heather,
You and your comments are very welcome here. I'm glad you found us! You might find HealthyPlace.com (this blog is part of HealthyPlace) in general to be a helpful resource, especially given that it's hard to find a psychologist where you are. Unfortunately, talking openly about mental health problems is taboo in many places, even in the US. That's starting to change, which is great, but change never happens quickly!
What you describe is actually very common. It's common throughout life, and it's especially part of being a teenager. You're at a new place in life where you're beginning to really develop your own identity and a sense of who you are. School and peers make up a big part of your world right now, so social connections are part of the process of finding your identity. Think of it as an exploration or even an adventure as you discover who you are and who you want to become. Anxiety, including social anxiety, is a natural part of the process (when it becomes so intense that it starts getting in the way of your ability to live your life the way you want to and to do what you have to do ever day, that's when seeking help is very important; it can be in the form of articles and books if professional help isn't possible). It's also very natural to become friends with people/groups only to discover that you don't like them and don't want to be like them. It's part of learning who you are. After going through this myself (and still going through it, although not as intensely), being a high school teacher and counselor and thus working with students your age who expressed very similar thoughts, and having two teenage kids, I can confidently say that not only are you not alone, but you are among the vast, vast majority. The thing is, almost everyone is worried that there's something wrong with them for feeling this way, so they hide it. That means it looks like everyone but you has the friendship thing all figured out. They don't! And they're not supposed to yet. This is the developmental stage of teenagehood! So give yourself permission to accept who you are and to want to change friendships. It's okay to be friends with people but not really feel a true connection with them, and at the same time it's okay to seek out new friendships. (The exception, of course, is staying with a group of friends that make you uncomfortable because they are doing things that go against what's important to you. If behaviors are dangerous, you can stop hanging out with them right away. After all, it's not who you are, so it's okay to move on.) Just know that there's nothing wrong with you, and what you're experiencing is very normal.