Settling for Second Best or Even Worse

Here's what's happening on the HealthyPlace site this week:

Are You A Person Who Settles for 2nd, 3rd, 4th Best?

In Theresa Fung's relationship blog, "The Unlocked Life," she talks about settling for Mr. Okay instead of going after Mr. Right. It got me thinking about how many times people with mental health concerns settle for whatever life hands them. For instance, we:

  • continue to tolerate employment discrimination (thank goodness they let us work at all)
  • put up with mistreatment by loved ones or others (because someone is better than no one in our lives or because of our conditions we deserve to be mistreated)
  • let the doctor tell us we have to "learn to live with serious side effects" as if there were no options (at least he's seeing me and giving me some kind of treatment)

In the end, it really has to do with assertiveness and believing we deserve more. Whether it's a relationship, a job, medical or psychological treatment, or anything else, we shouldn't have to settle for "Mr. Okay."

Assertiveness: Getting What You Deserve

Share Your Mental Health Experiences

Share your thoughts on "stigma of mental illness" or any mental health subject, or respond to other people's audio posts, by calling our toll-free number (1-888-883-8045).

You can listen to what other people are saying by clicking on the gray title bars inside the widgets located on the "Sharing Your Mental Health Experiences" homepage, the HealthyPlace homepage, and the HealthyPlace Support Network homepage.

If you have any questions, write us at: info AT

"Experiencing Avoidant Personality Disorder" On HealthyPlace TV

In all her 58 years, Trish Poce has never held a "real job". She's deathly afraid to be around people. And this debilitating mental illness took it's toll on her. But it's not all bad news, as you'll see on this week's HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Show.

continue story below

Watch the interview with our guest, Trish Poce, currently featured on the HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Show website until next Wednesday; watch it here after that.

Still to Come in July on the HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Show

  • Irritable Male Syndrome: Why Some Mid-Life Men Turn Mean
  • How I Overcame Deadly Depression

If you would like to be a guest on the show or share your personal story in writing or via video, please write us at: producer AT

Click here for a list of previous HealthyPlace Mental Health TV Shows.

From HealthyPlace Mental Health Blogs

Your comments and observations are welcomed.

Feel free to share your thoughts and comments at the bottom of any blog post. And visit the mental health blogs homepage for the latest posts.

Coaching Compassion And Kindness To The Sadistic Sibling

Do you have a mean-spirited child that inflicts pain and suffering on other siblings? You're not alone. The Parent Coach, Dr. Steven Richfield, recently received this letter:

"Our older son is so mean and sadistic to our younger son that we minimize family vacations, and time together. Help!"

His thoughtful response on dealing with cruel and sadistic behavior in children is here.

back to: Mental-Health Newsletter Index

APA Reference
Staff, H. (2010, July 14). Settling for Second Best or Even Worse, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, May 19 from

Last Updated: September 4, 2014

Medically reviewed by Harry Croft, MD

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