Dealing with Verbal Abuse Changed My Perspective

August 11, 2022 Cheryl Wozny

It is natural to look back and reflect on your life and how you spend your time when you lose someone you love to illness or accident. However, I have realized that because of my recovery from verbal abuse, my journey has aided me in seeking out the life I want. This goal includes surrounding myself with supportive and loving people rather than condescending or abusive. My past abuse has changed my perspective.

The first time I lost a friend at a young age to an accident, I spent several years in anguish, replaying scenarios that I should have done or things I should have said. Thankfully, my therapists helped me heal and process her death in a healthy method that allowed me to move forward. 

Reflecting After Abuse Shows How My Perspective Changed

Unfortunately, as I grow older, I cannot escape the possibility of losing more family and friends through the years. However, my perspective has changed each time I attend a memorial service to honor those we loved and lost. Of course, I still cry and get upset during these sad times, but there are differences. 

After some time for proper grieving, I can look past the loss and celebrate the relationship of the person who is no longer here. I remember the fun events and good times with them and smile because I was fortunate enough to have that person in my life. 

Making Changes with Deliberate Choices

My recovery from verbal abuse has given me the strength and tools to make deliberate changes in my life that will result in more positive relationships. I no longer allow individuals to talk disrespectfully to me or engage in verbally abusive conversations

I mindfully choose the people I surround myself with in my personal and work relationships that support a better environment for my family and me. I have slowly learned what it means to put myself first so that I am better emotionally, mentally, and physically each day, enabling me to be a better person to my spouse and my children. 

And although I mourn the loss of loved ones that are no longer here each day, I actively seek out meaningful and healthy relationships in my current days. Because I never know when someone's days will end, I aim to enjoy a more positive life while I am here rather than experiencing a world of verbal abuse and harm. 

So, if you want a sign to make a change in your life for the better, this is it. Phone your friend for a coffee, talk with your grandmother as often as possible, and make an effort to have a friendly chat with the person at the bus stop. Each positive change you can make in your daily life will make a difference. 

APA Reference
Wozny, C. (2022, August 11). Dealing with Verbal Abuse Changed My Perspective, HealthyPlace. Retrieved on 2024, April 19 from

Author: Cheryl Wozny

Cheryl Wozny is a freelance writer and published author of several books, including a mental health resource for children, titled Why Is My Mommy So Sad? Writing has become her way of healing and helping others. Find Cheryl on TwitterInstagramFacebook, and on her blog

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