What Do You Do When Anxiety Makes You Feel Unreal?
I've been having a horrible time with anxiety. It still affects almost every area of my life. And although I've certainly gotten lots better at coping, my anxiety seems to be developing a new wrinkle: walking around feeling so alienated from the world that nothing feels real.
Oh, I still go through the motions, of course. I sleep, work, eat, blog, etc. But much of the time, it all feels like it's happening to someone else. It's like I'm not even there and have been replaced by a stranger who looks, talks, and acts like me but is actually not me.
I've had days lately where I feel like I'm losing my grip on reality. It's a terrifying experience. How this internal nothingness can cause so much pain is not something I understand at all.
When Anxiety Makes You Feel Unreal, What Do You Do?
Like I said, this is a new experience of anxiety for me. I've heard of dissociative disorders. I even knew feelings of depersonalization were common with anxiety disorder. It's just it was never more than intellectual knowledge -- until now.
I very much welcome your thoughts and suggestions about what you do when anxiety makes you feel unreal. This week, I need your help too.
You can find Greg on his website, Twitter, Google+, and Facebook.
APA Reference
Weber, G.
(2014, August 6). What Do You Do When Anxiety Makes You Feel Unreal?, HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, November 22 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/treatinganxiety/2014/08/what-do-you-do-when-anxiety-makes-you-feel-unreal
Author: Greg Weber
I'm 16 and have been suffering very similar symptoms. The feeling like iv'e been drugged, constantly tired after nights where i've had 10-13 hour sleeps, yet wake up still as tired as I was the day before. Nothing feels real, trouble speaking - can't get the words out properly, concentrating on anything is hard, reading and writing is difficult (including typing this), etc etc, this only started 4 days ago which doesn't seem that long but it's the WORST experience ever! I've suffered anxiety for a few years now and it has never taken this kind of affect on me and i've pinned it down to anxiety as this is what my gp has assured me it is. My gp has given me a few options to try out, 1 being medication, 1 being professional help (already had councillors, hypnotherapy etc) and the other option was both professional help and meds together. I have made the decision with my dad to try some more experienced professions to try help my situation first, before resorting to meds, not that, that would be a bad thing, however i'm only 16 and do not want to have to rely on such drugs at this stage. HOWEVER, if anyone has any suggestions for a faster recovery (I have exams coming up which I need to be able to concentrate for) then that would be very highly appreciated! Thank you!
Stella, I'm so sorry you're struggling right now. Discussing your situation with your GP and your parent is a great first step toward getting relief. Getting advice from a mental health expert, which is sounds like you plan to do, is a good next step. While there are few "quick fixes" in mental health, it often helps to know as much about the symptoms you're experiencing as possible. Have your read our series on depersonalization and dissociation? It might help you be able to talk about your experiences more thoroughly, which can greatly impact your therapist or psychiatrist's ability to help you. https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/dissociativeliving/2011/06/normalizing-dissociation-pa…
Oh my God, I was reading this and the whole time you talked about your symptoms was in 100% agreement. I am also 16 and I experience the same troubles with sleepiness, unrealness, speaking and writing (trying to put my thoughts into words and onto paper), concentrating/staying focused, and reading. I've had these symptoms for quite a while (not sure how long, my memory is deteriorating) and neither my parents nor doctor have shown the slightest concern when I have described some of these symptoms, so I have essentially diagnosed myself with anxiety. I'm not sure what to do with myself at this point and I'm too nervous to seek help.
Hi Ariel, thank you for sharing. I know it can feel a bit scary to ask for help, but it is truly one of the most important steps to being able to cope and feel better. If you're experiencing symptoms that are affecting school, daily activities, etc., it's a good idea to talk to someone. You might consider talking to your school social worker as a starting point, especially if you find it hard to communicate your needs to your parents. Your school counselor or social worker may be able to serve as the bridge to getting you the support you need. Here's an article about asking for mental health help.
https://www.healthyplace.com/other-info/mental-health-newsletter/are-you-afraid-to-ask-fo…
I have been facing same problem like you discussed. I analyzed so many things and I found that my daily routine may be affecting that. Yes I think too much about everything but I stopped thinking about stress and my problems long time back like 3-4 years then why I get these anxiety attacks and why I feel myself and surrounding unreal. The answer I found that I should first organize my daily routine properly like sleeping early, waking up early like 7 Am or 8 Am, having good healthy food because we are what we eat. Don't sleep more than 8 hrs in a day. May be sleeping alot make our mind feels like we are still dreaming even though we are awake. I used to sleep 12hrs to 13 hrs and still used to feel like I am tired but I organised my daily routine and I found that may be sleeping too much was the main issue behind my anxiety. We also feel depersonalize and deassociated due to having psychoactive drugs like weed and other drugs because that affect not on body but on brain so avoid that because if you have it brain will behave like you are not attached to body and you are some where else, time will slow down. If this happens once brain will have habit of behaving like it again and again even though you are not having psychoactive drugs so please avoid consumption of any drugs. Another thing I noticed that this may be happening due to I am not talking with people, I am not involved in people and surrounding. If you be alone for so much time and you are being lazy and doing nothing and just sleeping you will feel anxious because you will feel like you are doing nothing in life. So I advice you:-
1) Be busy always, stay active,stay focused.
2) Don't just dream take actions as per your plan.
3) Don't worry about your past, Don't regret anything, everything happens for a reason.
4) Involve yourself with your surrounding, people,friends, talk to them.
5) Don't sleep more than 8 hrs daily. Sleep early wake up early. Oversleep also can cause problems.
6) Make fix routine for your work, sleep, meal etc
7) Don't think like you have any mental health issue or health problem because mind is so powerful because even though maybe you don't have that particular problem you will feel like you have that problem so don't think about it, don't give damn about your mental issue because it will get increased if you think about it, if you don't think about it will be automatically vanished.
8) Always remember, that problem is temporary and you are strong enough to overcome any problem. Creator and it's creation are not two different things but one, So you have all powers that creator almighty GOD has. You are not alone GOD is with you. He is supreme just believe in that, he will not let anything that will harm you. GOD will protect you like you are GOD'S child.
9) This is very important advise, watch any funny video or movie with gossips daily for at least 30 minutes. Watch anything that will make you happy and smile.
10) Best medicine for any mental health problem is Smile and laugh so laugh and keep smiling always. Start your everyday with positive mind, run or jog atleast 15 minutes a day. Follow these all 10 advices and you will start feeling like you never had mental illeness or any problem. Good luck You are perfect ?
I'm a fretting teenager who has been having a rather mediocre time of it. For the past month and a half, I've been feeling depressed, anxious and unreal. Who knows whether I'm anxious because I'm depressed, or I'm depressed because I'm anxious, or I'm depressed because I feel unreal and I'm anxious that I won't get better. It's extremely jumbled.
However, for the first time in a week or two, I get to feel like I'm finally 'me' again. No need to search through my past memories trying to piece together what is 'me' and inevitably ending up with the conclusion that 'my mind is completely fucked.'
Do you have a map of the world in your head? A way things are meant to 'feel' when you look at them; like no matter what happens, reality can't change, so it's all okay? Well, I felt like that at some point. Certainly not during this month. It doesn't feel like I'm a different person. For me, someone who became obsessed with computers and games from a young age, it feels like I'm behind the screen and I can't get away. That's the definition of 'unreal' we're dealing with here.
Everything feels like it's spinning, nothing feels the same, everything feels completely weird and different, or rather, I feel completely different.
Yesterday, I had a very annoying experience. Mind fog - that thing that prevents you from thinking clearly - overwhelmed me. I didn't know how to think, my thoughts were lost, but I was still fundamentally rational; somewhere inside. Like I was constantly asleep, or constantly not real, that my thoughts are completely mismatched with reality. That last one is the one truth. It's the worst feeling ever. There's nothing worse. It's the absolute worst I've ever felt, and I know it's the absolute worst I'll ever feel.
Disassociation. When nothing feels the same, nothing feels familiar, and you can't calm down know matter what. That's how it was for me. That chronic feeling of pointlessness shows up as well. No real 'sense' of anything; completely out of it; completely out of whack. So afraid to let go of my now-fragmented understanding of the world that I can't get better. The feeling that I'm awake when I'm asleep and I'm asleep when I'm awake.
But at any rate, I feel much, much better right now. Fog has cleared up 75%. Mental faculties still there. It was never like they were disabled, after all.
The wonderful bit of irony is that it is, of course, entirely my own fault. I didn't want to lose whatever fragmented sense of self I had left, so I became inactive, and the only thing I tried to do was 'remember how things were'.
But, of course, that didn't work too well. All I succeeded in doing was consciously crippling myself, slowly shrinking the things that I can do while anxiety slowly erodes my consciousness. I won't say that 'depression is a victim-less crime' or anything of the sort, but in my case, it was entirely my fault for responding in completely the wrong way.
The constant mental discomfort I felt is alleviated somewhat now, and I can at least accept the depressive feelings currently attempting to topple me. Well, it's anyone's guess whether I can return to the way I was before, but since I like to think of myself as a person who has been pretty well-linked to reality, I'm sure "I'm" out there somewhere. I've recovered my ability to feel positive feelings, so there's a step in the right direction. Concentration still incredibly low. Still pretty depressed, though. Still feel like a complete shell of myself. Can only hope that I'll improve after sleep.
Yep, I'm venting. Meh.
I'm glad to hear you're feeling somewhat better. Are you seeing someone for your depression? That will likely help you continue to improve. This article may also offer some good advice: https://www.healthyplace.com/depression/articles/overcoming-depression-and-finding-happin….
Hey! 22 here. You've verbalized something I've tried to verbalize to therapists and doctors for the past year but my anxiety and brain fog prevented me from feeling quick on my feet, mentally (and lately now that I haven't been dancing, physically). You're writing skills are stellar- maybe blogging might be an outlet for you? I also had issues with feeling attached to my screen and recently had to go to a job with no internet for 2 weeks and holy sh+t the combination of being around cool/new people, putting myself out there (sober) and being away from all forms of technology was amazing. I felt like a completely different person, my doctor also recently had me to a blood test for the MTHFR gene mutation (blood test paid for via insurance) and apparently I have a gene mutation that causes me to produce my neurotransmitters at 70-75% less than they should (nordic people are predisposed to that sort of thing). Something to do with a messed up methylation pathway-something worth checking out but yeah anyways I just wanted to say you obviously have a gift for writing and being in touch with yourself. You could be a therapist or writer (if you wanted :) best of luck and hope you start feeling better!
I suffered panic attack like a month ago. since then I have not been myself. now things around me are looking strange. I am even thinking I have a brain problem. I worry too much about everything. I am scared and confused.... I don't know what to do... it's like something is blocking my brain and sometimes I think strangely... like I am going insane
I go through the same thing. Sometimes I feel like I’m going insane. Very debilitating. I freak out because I’m afraid I’m losing touch. Don’t know how I got here. God bless
I have been feeling like this for a while.. could be around 6 years I am not sure. But i have really noticed it more now the past couple months. I am 30 yrs old. Married, have a 2 yr old. Stressful job. Lost my son 6 years ago. So.... i have never been diagnosed with any thing like anxiety or whatever... but now starting to think something going on. This hazey/fog feeling, derealization, is driving me nuts and I dont know where ro start. Its been "noticeable" the past couple months. Every day, 24/7. Whats going on? Where do I start? Do i go to a doctor or therapist? I even thought It might be my eyesight going real bad... cant deal with this emotionless, worrying state. Arg.
Hi, Natasha. If you're feeling like this, you should certainly consider seeing a doctor or therapist. Check out this article (https://www.healthyplace.com/anxiety-panic/anxiety-information/where-to-get-anxiety-help-…) for tips on how to start. You may also find the resources here helpful: https://www.healthyplace.com/anxiety-panic/. I wish you the best of health, and I hope you begin feeling better soon.
I am feeling exactly what you said for the past few years.. derealisation sort of..total unreality, memory issues , lack of thinking capability or common sense. I used to take anxiety meds. Now I have stopped meds, started lifestyle changes, waking up in the morning, go for a peaceful walk, activate your senses by touch, smell, hear obejcts around you whenever you remember to do it. Start self talking as you do things, it will help you prevent auto dreaming. Do it for a month, its tuff I know but I trust you can do that and feel the change
Have been feeling unreal since I had my first panic attack,am on medication for the anxiety but still feeling unreal almost all the time.How do I overcome this scary feeling?
Hi Anita, Please be sure to speak with your doctor who prescribed your medication to discuss your symptoms. I also suggest trying grounding techniques like these: https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/dissociativeliving/2015/01/use-grounding-techniques-wh…, and particularly tapping, which I talk about in this article and video: https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/treatinganxiety/2017/08/a-technique-to-calm-anxiety-wh…. Anything you can do to bring your awareness into your body in the present moment can be useful.
I don't know what is going on, it's feels like on weed or something. I just feel so strange at times even my own hands don't feel like mine.This feeling comes and goes but when it comes its really scary, I feel like I may die or something. I was having serious issues concentrating and sleeping. The doctor diagnosed depression but sometimes it doesn't feel like it.I'm scared.Please help me
Thank you for reaching out. I'm really sorry to hear you're experiencing such a rough time. I recommend seeing a therapist that can offer you some ways of coping with these symptoms. One of the key ways to feel like your hands and body are indeed yours and real is what we call grounding. Grounding is bringing our awareness to our senses to become more present. This tapping tool is one way to ground: https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/tag/tapping-tool-to-calm-anxiety/ Here's an article with some other suggestions: https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/treatinganxiety/2010/09/top-21-anxiety-grounding-techn… I hope you find a bit of relief in some of these.
I’ve been feeling this a lot lately. My main concern is, of it is anxiety in my case, because it has been happening for months, and sometimes it lasts a few days. Is it possible for anxiety to cause a symptom to stay a long time? Great blog by the way. Thank you for writing it.
Hi Drew, I'm responding to your comment on behalf of the author. I'm glad it was helpful for you. Anxiety symptoms certainly can last for months and that can be indicative of an anxiety disorder. Read this for a better understanding of Generalized Anxiety Disorder: (https://www.healthyplace.com/anxiety-panic/gad/generalized-anxiety-disorder-symptoms-gad-…). I'm not sure what specific symptoms you're experiencing, but my advice to you is to seek professional support so that you can obtain appropriate treatment and find sme relief. Wishing you the very best in the new year.
Hey i been feeling unreal with shortness of breath,cramps all over my body and blur vision. i went to the doctor 5 times they told me my lungs are clean, my blood is also clean. actually nothing wrong with me. i was asking what could be wrong with me
Hi Frederick,
HealthyPlace can't give medical advice or mental health diagnoses. If you have been going to the same doctor/clinic and are unsatisfied with how they examined you, you definitely have the right to see someone else at a completely different clinic. Also, if you think that your symptoms might be mental health related (such as anxiety disorders or other conditions), you might consider visiting a therapist to share your symptoms and medical history. It's frustrating to feel unheard, and you really do have the right to see other doctors/professionals.
Hi im struggling with anxiety and I'm scared it's real because it feels real it's really uncomfortable I get chest tightness is this just anxiety it's making me doubt everything and I'm scared it's real.
My first panic attack was at age 8 or 9. I felt an unexplainable rush of doom and I couldn’t breathe. I never experienced anything like that again until I smoked weed for the first time when I was 16. Being high was the most terrifying experience in my life. The lack of control I had over my mind felt like I was losing grip on reality. I ended up in the hospital. Ever since that day I have been dealing with depersonalization, and it’s been almost 3 years. Sometimes I feel like I can ground myself, but mostly I just learn to cope with it. This last summer I was sexually assaulted which has completely taken a toll on my mental health. I suppress the memory so much, and now can hardly recall details but I still get triggered by minor things. I feel like I am living in two different realms. I am a straight A college student who has a job and can manage my time and organize myself, yet at the same time I feel so out of control. Some days I am outspoken and love to talk, other days I feel like I have never heard my voice before. I just want to feel normal. I haven’t been able to maintain a healthy relationship or friendship for three years due to my lack of coherency. Sometimes I feel so mentally incapable that I start to forget things that happened a few minutes ago. I hope that I can live a happy life. I hope that one day I will be better.
everything make me scare even if i see my friend,mom,sound like phone rings, sms notification rings....(i'm scare of the whole world and everything) even thinking make me scare,even looking at someone beautiful increase my heartbeat,i cant relax.my heart pounds like is going out of my chest.total complete loss of appetite,i can say even 200% loss of appetite,i don' t remember getting hungry or thirsty,chronic tiredness,total loss of weight,i feel like fire run in my body,i feel like a tube going into my stomach, i feel like the pain is everywhere ,it seems like i'm possessed, i feel like a stranger everywhere even in my own house, my head feels like is going to explode into pieces and my whole joints feel detached to each other, not interested in good life, short breathing, joints pain, tense muscles from toe to head,stiffness around the neck,jaw clacking like bones are broken.feeling like nobody loves me, i feel like i'm too ugly.i'm scare to talk to any girl.alternation of diarrhea and constipation, problem of concentration, vibration of my body,insomnia,feeling of a knot in throat and belly,feeling of going crazy, heartburn,teeth grinding,feel like i'm burning, everything irritate me, i criticize everything, feeling like my life has no meaning,feeling like people always mock at me because i'm skinny and my face has pimples since i was 14 and those pimples made me look very ugly and that really made hate going to school,public gatherings, chasing girls..etc.
i cannot explain because of other weird feelings.i prefer dying than living like this.
to sum it up i feel like my body is old and outdated.
I’m going through a REAL similar problem.. you’re not alone
PS: i hate myself, i feel guilty,i feel like i'm a looser,i don't like my name,i have difficulty swallowing,my heartbeat makes tremble, my nerves or vains pump up and they are visible all the way. i hate every place, i change even countries but still i hate every country i go.i feel like it's the country,lifestyle, people ,my work...which cause my suffering.my world is like black and white.
I believe you are Loved and have a purpose here, you just need to remember that you were CREATED, you are a product of a word spoken from the Creatornof the univere. You're special.