Fall Soothes My Schizoaffective Disorder

Fall is my favorite season. It’s a very healing time of year for me and my schizoaffective disorder with the cooler weather and still sunny days. And this year, I’m appreciating fall as much as I can.

Why Fall Is Healing for My Schizoaffective Disorder

The cooler weather is a big part of why fall is a good season for my schizoaffective disorder. The summer heat triggers my schizoaffective anxiety. I really like wearing hooded sweatshirts and jackets, and fall is the perfect weather for that.

Fall has been my favorite season since I was a little kid. I remember one of my friends in middle school saying she thought it was unusual to like fall more than spring. But in Chicago, we don’t really get much of a taste of spring. It’s basically winter until May. And, in what passes for spring here, it rains a lot--my schizoaffective anxiety makes me skittish about going out in the rain. I can’t explain why.

Because of My Schizoaffective Anxiety, I Celebrate Halloween My Own Way

Now, I know plenty of people with schizoaffective disorder and with anxiety can celebrate Halloween, but, for me, my illness makes it hard for me to celebrate, even though I love autumn.

First of all, parties stress me out. I realize this Halloween won’t involve too many parties because of COVID-19. But in the past, that’s been a hard thing for me. I don’t decorate for Halloween either because my apartment is so messy and disorganized, and it’s really hard for me to decorate at all. Then there's the final blow--I don’t like scary movies.

So, my husband Tom and I celebrate Halloween in our own way. We watch a Halloween-themed movie that isn’t a horror movie, like Ed Wood, Tim Burton’s movie starring Johnny Depp about the B movie director who is famous for his bad movies that tended to revolve around scary themes. And I usually wear a simple costume: a hat with cat ears that Tom knitted for me, eyeliner whiskers, and a dab of pink lipstick on the tip of my nose.

When I was a kid, my parents used to take us apple picking in the fall, and we’d carve jack-o-lanterns. Tom and I don’t do those things, but, again, we celebrate fall in our own way. I’ve been taking more walks outside to enjoy the weather. Because of COVID-19, it’s a challenge, though. I get angry at people who aren’t social distancing or bothering to wear a mask. But I feel that being outside is the most important way I can enjoy fall, and walking outside is good for my schizoaffective anxiety.

Also, I bought a selection of lotions with fall-inspired scents such as pumpkin latte and apple. Tom and I even got a pumpkin-scented bathroom spray that smells just like fresh-baked pumpkin pie.

I’m enjoying myself. Having joy in my life is one of the most important supports to fight my schizoaffective disorder and the anxiety that comes with it.