Anger, Anxiety and Unsafe Thoughts That Lead to Self-Harm

For those who struggle with self-harm, emotions are often intense. When you’re in a positive, safe place, you tend to feel as if you will always have the strength to push past those daily stressors. When worried or anxious, your body goes into hyperactive mode, thinking that a small cut or burn may turn off the paranoia. For those who self-harm, anger can be one of the most frightening feelings of all because when you feel this emotion, it is hard to stop yourself from harming your body.

It can be difficult controlling unsteady emotions, especially for those with mental illness. Emotions play a huge role in overcoming the need to self-harm. Once you find ways to effectively control your emotions, you may find it easier to control the urges to cut or burn or pick.

Anger and Self-Harm

I’ve never really been an angry person. I have found ways to turn my anger into a different emotion after years of working at it. However, we all have moments of anger simply because we are human. During my years of cutting, I felt angry on almost a daily basis. I would become angry with myself for saying something I shouldn’t have or for looking a certain way. I’d get mad if my best friend was talking to another friend more than me and I would take it out on myself. This would often lead to anxiety over urges to cut my skin.

Anxiety and anger have always seemed to work hand-in-hand in some cases. When we are paranoid about something and if that something doesn’t turn out the way we hoped, anger typically follows if we do not use our positive coping skills.

These situations could lead to unsafe thoughts and unsafe thoughts could lead to grabbing any sharp object in sight.

Do Not Let Upsetting Emotions Turn Into Negative Behaviors like Self-Harm

Recently, a four-year-old I know hit his mother in the face. When his mother told me this, she told me how difficult it had been for her to hold back her anger. For anyone who has experienced this, you would agree that it isn’t easy. After he took some time alone, he was talked to and told to use his words when he is angry and to squeeze his teddy bear instead. Later on, when someone in the room started getting frustrated, he told them to squeeze his bear.

At a young age, we are able to connect with our negative emotions and find helpful solutions. However, as we grow older, we realize it isn’t always easy to replace negative behaviors with positive ones. We can verbally tell ourselves what to do instead of self-harming – listen to music, take a walk, punch a punching bag. However, when anger is at it’s highest peak and your mind is stirring with thoughts of self-harm, those coping skills often disappear.

It’s important to become in touch with the emotions that typically take over your body in unsafe ways. By knowing how your body reacts to certain situations, you can work on finding ways to help yourself instead of hurting yourself. Once you find ways that work, baby steps will lead you to a positive place.

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