Self-Harm and Preparing for the Unexpected (and the Expected)
Life is weird.
That is one statement almost everyone can agree to be true. Nothing is normal about the lives we live, even if we follow the same boring schedule day after day. Even for those who think they have their lives planned to perfection, something out of the ordinary will happen to rearrange that agenda.
Something is bound to happen to shake your life up and when it does happen, will you be ready? Will you have those handy dandy coping skills ready to go? Will you stand with a smile and stay positive?
We’re all human and many of us won’t be ready to pull coping skills out from our pockets right when we need them.
Try Not to Expect the Worst, Even When You’re Already Expecting it
In my recent blogs, I’ve been talking about how life has not been easy for me lately. In the past, if I were feeling this way, I would have immediately turned to scissors or pen caps or can tabs for an answer. I’ve learned over time that self-injury help is possible and that there are positive coping skills to turn to for help.
It’s hard to admit to myself that I haven’t felt this low since I was sixteen-years-old – almost ten years ago. For those struggling with mental illnesses involving mood issues, depression comes and goes often. However, the depression I’ve been in lately has not been one of the come-and-go types. It has been a constant burden on my shoulders and I wasn’t fully prepared for this emotional state.
In truth, I should have seen this coming. I left my overly stressful job during one of the coldest winters I can remember (which is the one we’re dealing with now, if you didn’t catch on) and now I’m struggling to pay my bills and find a new job. I probably should have been more prepared to handle these emotions when they came flying at me like a wall of ice.
Preparing for the Unexpected Makes Self-Harm Change Possible
For self-harmers, sometimes it’s easy to predict when your next urge to cut is going to be. Sadly, it becomes engrained in your brain – you go to math class, you fail a test, and you cut. And, as we all know, it’s even harder to tell yourself to stop thinking that way before your walk into a difficult situation.
You need to try to adjust your mind-map and expect something different - something other than the trigger you think will be there. Instead of fearing a bad grade, look for someone in the room you can talk to about your worries. You will surprise yourself when you make it through a tough scenario without cutting or burning. When you surprise yourself in that way, you impress yourself and that leads to more moments of success.
Plan out your day, prepare for the unexpected, so when unexpected self-harm triggers arise, you have a coping skill prepared. Actually, tuck two coping skills in your pockets. Two coping skills are better than one when it comes to handling a difficult situation.
You can also find Jennifer Aline Graham on Google+, Facebook, Twitter and her website is here. Find out more about Noon through Amazon.com.
APA Reference
Aline, J.
(2014, February 14). Self-Harm and Preparing for the Unexpected (and the Expected), HealthyPlace. Retrieved
on 2024, December 18 from https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/speakingoutaboutselfinjury/2014/02/self-harm-and-preparing-for-the-unexpected-and-the-expected
Author: Jennifer Aline Graham
A dear friend talks about the strong urges when she feels like cutting. How can I help her through these, especially since I'm almost 3000km away. Much of our contact is online. Thanks.